My H wants a separation. We have two children together and I want this to impact them as little as possible.

How should this "look" as my H has no clear picture whether he wants to save the M. If he was taking a breather with the intent to reinvest himself in the relationship, then it would be different. I want to make this as amicable as possible and I want to protect my kids as much as possible from this mess, but I do not want to protect him from the consequences of his actions.

I need guidance as to what this separation should look like:

-visitation/custody
-bills getting paid/his responsibilities
-protecting myself from the cost he will incur living alone
-should this be legal or wait to see if we can work it out together as much as possible?

I want to save my M, so as much time as I can have to be around him and keep our bond is important to me, but I also have concerns about him having needs met by me and not feeling the truth of what this will look like.

Any help would be appreciated.

Is your H having an affair?

If you don't want a separation from your H, I would not agree to it. Tell him that you would like to work on your marriage. That is best done with you living together..

Let him seek a separation on his on and figure it out on his own. I would not make it easy for him or help him with this.

I don't think he is.

What do you mean? Are there any other signs that he is?

One sign typically is a desire for a marital separation...

Mimi is right. First off, you need to find out if he is having an affair.

Second, are you a Christian? Is he?

Third, separation is not good unless you want your marriage to end. So, as long as you want this marriage to succeed, do not agree to things like timeouts (that is for 2 year olds who cant behave), separations, and the like. This includes talkign about divorce. Yo uare either married or you are divorced. There is no middle ground.

Ask yourself this question...why does he want to separate and why does he want to do so amicably?

He is hiding something. I will bet my next paycheck on it. Either he is in an affair, or he is contemplating one and wants to be separated so he will feel right about it. of course, separated and having sex with someone else equals adultery, just as being together and having sex with someone else.

We are here to help. But you will need to find out mroe info and also provide us with mroe info.

In His arms.