Today at work there was an article on the hospital internet about the results of the Captain's/Admiral's Mast. A lieutenant at work was found guilty of behavior unbecoming to an officer - adultery. He was fined half of his pay for 6 months, and confined to work for 6 months.

I was quite pleased to see that our Navy still takes these things seriously.

Hooah!!

Hey, B! Long time no speak. But I'll bet you knew this would get me out on the boards. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

DOn't I wish the Canadian Navy did a darn thing. But even though my WH admitted the PA with a shipmate, because they were not in the same unit, she is stores he is a engineer, it is not illegal. In fact I was told that it was an infringement of their rights for me to complain. Well something along that line. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />
How much closer can you get than on a 3month cruise in a ship with less than 200 people? HMMM???

Just a bunch of cover your butt talks and not-so veiled threats to sue me becasue I bi+ched loud and long.

I wasn't asking htem to be fired. I asked that they be separated while we went through counselling. NEver happened. Never will now. Dork is not with Ditchpig3. He is with Ditchpig4 a married woman. WHo told me that no one cares that they are both married to someone else.

Don't get me started! I am in a Plan B. Cannot deal his his BS.

The thing about it is that EVERYONE in the hospital will know about the affair. Also EVERYONE will know what will happen if they commit adultery (if they are military).

Also it is practically unheard of to have an Admiral's Mast. This is the first one in the five years I've been working here.

The lieutenant will be quite busy for the next 6 months. He may not be spending much time with his wife, but he won't be spending time with the OW either.

speaking of which, hey mortor, haven't heard anymore from h's LTC about the money issue when he goes to Iraq. It's been a week and a half and no call getting back to me (he said it would just be a few days....) oh well, will just wait until h goes to guards in november and see what happens then.... H mentioned nothing to me that they spoke with him nor had he mentioned anything about seeing a lawyer.... so... all this silence of course drives someone like me nuts! LOL

I did mention to h in an email I sent him that I knew guards had spoken to him, that I had appealed to them over the summer in hopes of help for our marriage and talking some sense into him,and that his LTC was very nice and helpful.
Also said I knew he was to show proof of something by November. Gave him a little reality by telling him to be ready to shell out around 600.00 for the sep and to be sure it gave me everything I am entitled to under NYS law or I wasn't signing it. I then proceeded to tell him about ALL the evidence I have of adultery, etc, all the evidence he had no idea I had.... And I have a lot. I am sure he went "WTF?!" Told him these were just some things to think about...... Told him also a lot of the evidence I got came straight from the ow since she cannot keep her big mouth shut to her stbxh... including emails he forwarded to me from her. I told him to tell her thank you for me for all the info. I told him she tries to knife me by telling her h all these details knowing he will tell me but that all she is doing is slicing h's throat because i can than take all that valuable info and use it if I have to.

I ended by telling him I loved the man I married very very much and would love to share with him all the changes I have made, would love to share the house I am redecorating inside and out, etc, with the man I married, and that the door is always open for that man. I asked him if he saw my husband anywhere would he please tell him that, because I had no idea where that man was! mlhb

I am glad to hear that...

IMHO, the military needs to be ACTIVELY pursuing adultery...the reason being are the FAMILIES waiting for the member to return from deployments, only to find out that adultery was rampant because our military still thinks that deploying "professional" males and females together and away from family for extended periods will not result in broken families.

It is evil...pure and simple.

Actually its surprising he got that punishment. Most commands will try to keep it in office and under wraps with little to no actual punishment meted out.

He must have messed with another officer's wife.


(Im the wife of a Navy Master at Arms)

It made me feel good that it was treated so seriously. After all, we know about the double standards that sometimes happen.

I'll post more when I find out all the details, which I will. Everyone is talking about it at work.

I still think it is good to expose if the WS is in the military, and at least give the command a chance to do the right thing.

bumping, this is a good post....

Yes, I agree.....unfortunately, the LemonHAM National Council on Infidelity and Adultery and Risk Factor Modification has uncovered the extremely high risk ratio of military activity and infidelity....sad, but true. We are still working to uncover other traits that may have "counfounded" this finding. "Guns" and "Hunting" and "camoflauge" outfitting seem to be the likely culprits, but the data has not all been coagulated.

It is nice to see the Navy taking this seriously.

Lemonman, MD
Founder of the LemonHAM National Council on Infidelity and Adultery and Risk Factor Modification

lemonman you crack me up! mlhb

I have always noticed an extremely high infidelity rate in the military, and mojodiva is right, usually, they keep it hush hush. It is my estimate that infidelity is well over 50% for both servicemembers (SM), and their spouses. I know of dozens of SM's and spouses alike who are enjoying their temporary single lives.
Its not an excuse, but when you are gone for 25 months of a 48 month marriage, how much of a marriage is that really? That is another reason why I am so willing to forgive my wife, and rebuild.

I strongly agree with you Ray. I know a handful of women right now who are greatly enjoying their single life. I also know what it feels like not having your spouse around for the M. We probably have 6 months together maybe shorter. He will be home in Jan of this coming year, the first time i will face him since i found out about the A.
I know in his company his commander kept everything hush but my H did tell some Sgts and his friends what he did. They called him stupid and everything else that i dont think is approciate to be written here. Made me feel great. We are both working to saving our M and we just cant wait to see each other 90 days and counting!!

Ray and Ronaile........I think honestly Military infidelity is almost like a different animal to slay ( not easier or worse) but different...the principles still apply, but the very nature of military duty is NOT SETUP for a marriage to thrive. When I see of a militray affair, I usually sigh, because that type of affair is frought with additonal burdens, that never quite go away....don't give up hope though....goodluck.

Lem

P.S. Thank you for serving in our armed forces. We all don't give you our appreciation enough.

Lemonman,

I agree with you to an extent. The military does not try hard enough to help with the military marriages. Thats why divorce rates are so high in the military esp. during deployments but thats mainly for officers not saying the enlisted are any better. As for my H's A, truly believe as the rest of my family does that this was a mistake and stupid action taken upon him. I dont stick up for his actions one bit, it was a mistake happened once its done and i KNOW its over with. Right now all my H does is keeps his head on straight knowing that he has a loving wife and two wonderful children to come home to. I know its gunna be different once i see him in Jan. I think the military needs to start caring a little more about their servicemembers marriages as well as they do in carrying out their dailly working routines.

DOD could start by criminalizing ALL adultery, not just the adultery that affects "good order and discipline"...a vague term that gives some weak CO's the wiggle room to get out of doing anything.

Like Vlad the Impaler used to do, a few "bodies" left out on stakes as examples to those who are THINKING about cheating, might save a few people.

With deployments a way of life now and the intermingling of the sexes in most units, this will never stop. Commands MUST actively be rooting this out. Not a lot can be done about a cheating Dependant spouse, but Commands can go after the cheating AD member.

This is kind of a sore subject with me right now, and not only because of my H's history of affairs while deployed.

A friend contacted me about a military member who is borderline stalking her. I investigated a bit and I've found six separate military wives that he's been contacting online or in person to try to have sex with. I shudder to think how many he must have contacted if I found six that easily.

One of the husbands went to his command recently about it, and was told that he'd have to go to legal to get a restraining order against this jerk.

I'd hoped that the command would take a more active interest in stopping this behavior. I've asked all six women to give me whatever emails they have so we can take them to his CMC. Let's hope they do it.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

Dobie