so that all of us BS'S could beat the crap out of them for a couple of days. We could speed our recoveries and not even have to LB our FWS. I vote for having this in Amarillo, TX. If we run out of WH and OM, Mel could bring some stray cats. Just a thought

NTD, I only want to beat the crap out of one OM. And he knows I could do it. And I told him I might decide to any day.

But you know - knowing he lives in fear of my wrath lasts longer than the fun of breaking his legs, and I can't get arrested for it !:)

I won't beat up on my FWW. I love her and she's awfa' sorry.

BTW can you SHOW ME THE WAY TO AMARILLO ? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Bob:

I am the same way. Just one particular OM that I would want at the function. But it really is somewhat fulfilling that OM has to look over his shoulder for the rest of his life thinking that this might be the day that it happens.

As for directions to Amarillo, I could get you there from anywhere. But it is kind of like [censored] hunting...you haven't lived until you have been to Amarillo, and then you wonder why you want to live...lol.

If we have this function, definately FWW are not invited. They need love and encouragement, not further kicks in the stomach.

There are a few WH still in the fog that we could do a favor to their BS and knock them back into reality though.

Interesting that everyone would love to pound the OM in their lives. The Bible speaks of this desire, and how the OM is an idiot for doing this because he literally risks his own life:


In His arms.

Mortorman:

I wrote the original post in jest, although I think it would still be a good idea just to see them all squirm.

I found that scripture shortly after D-Day. Have talked to my priest often about that. My priest also reminds me that we do not have the right to take the revenge ourselves and that if we are consumed with the thought of the revenge and the associated anger about those who have sinned against us that we will not only not be able to fully recover but that it could prevent us from seeking our own forgiveness.

Quite a conflict for most of us. I thought about sending that verse that you posted along with a copy of the movie where the BS seeks out the OM and WW and kills them both just for some food for thought for OM. I know this is not the Christian attitude that I should have but it does take the edge off.

That's fine. I knew it was in jest.

It just reminded me though of how utterly stupid OPs are, especially OMs. I mean, here I am, an infanry soldier, fighting overseas right after 9/11, and this guy takes up with my wife.

He must be an awfully trusting (or stupid) person to think that I wouldnt come back and do to him what we were doing to the bad guys. This guy was lucky because he banged a woman who's infantry husband was also following Christ.

Because without Jesus, the Troll would have found himself confronted with one pissed-off grunt!

In His arms.

bwahahahaaaa! Only problem is that it would cruel and inhuman to make even a CAT go to Amarillo! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

this thread makes me feel sad. i'm not telling anyone what to do, but i am making known my feelings. maybe i am the only FWW that is upset by seeing this.... maybe not.

FinallyLearning,

You shouldnt be offended. First off, it is just a bunch of BSs venting. Healthy, in comparison with the alternative wouldnt you say?

Secondly, as the Scripture passage I posted, even God acknowledges the jealous rage all BSs feel when confronted with adultery by their WS. If you have not been a BS, then it may be hard for you to understand the sheer rage that coems with this. Try to imagine someone molesting your child, or killing them. How you would feel towards that person. Those feelings are pretty similar to what the BS feels toward the OP.

They are normal feelings. They are rational feelings. What is not normal, nor rational, is to act upon those feelings.

Revenge and punishment for this sits with God. The thing about the Troll (my wife's OM) is that I could have taken care of him very well. But instead, I am letting God take care of Him. I figure He is more powerful than me, so He should be able to outdo me in punsihing the OM for what he did. And God has promised me that He will repay!

So, no reason to be upset here. Just a bunch of BSs venting.

In His arms.

I don't find the thread funny at all. I think it is sad and pathetic that jokes like this are made frequently here, at the expense of alienating WSs and OPs. If they have come here, then they are more than likely looking for answers to better themselves.

I will not apologize for having an opinion on this. I think it's really too bad that because someone is betrayed, they think it gives them the right to hurt other people.

What a sad human defense mechanism(that I am guilty of as well, but at least I am aware of it).

Being betrayed does not give you 'license to kill'

Mortarman:

Very well said. You are a great service to this board and to our country and are sincerly appreciated.

Mel, I agree with you that Amarillo is no place even for cats.

Finally Learning- I think Mortarman really said it all. It is healthy for the BS to vent. It is not healthy for the BS to take their own action as God will take care of that for us in his own time, with his own power. In my particular sitch, even after ten years, the OM although he is presumably reconciled with his wife (she told me this) he has still sought out my wife at certain crowded events "just to say hi". My wife avoids him like the plague and lets him know each time that any contact is unacceptable. Last time this happened (three years ago) he asked her "Can't we still be friends?" No [censored], you cannot be friends with someone elses wife when you are married and had an inappropriate relationship with that person. That total ignorance on his part is why I started this post to begin with. A good 2x6 upside his head may actually make him think with his head instead of his peter.

As for the location being in Amarillo, I just figured the 2x6 would be bigger and no one would miss a few stray cats.

I think I said that!

In His arms.

MM, thanks for sharing your perspective, as i said, i am not trying to tell anyone what to think or say.

i am sharing my response to what is being said.

you may think there is no reason to take offense, but that does not change my reaction to the post. please don't think that since you do not understand another's reaction that you can discount it so quickly.

patriot, thank you for your sharing too.

as a side note... i only had a few hours of sleep last night which never helps. i've been trying to sort out my head some. i've been trying to adjust how i respond to the problem, see it more as an opportunity than a problem. i'll probably post more about it in my own thread later. however, my point is, i realize my reaction to this is not soley due to the words written here but also due to how i am feeling in general today. i figured that is worth sharing too.

I get a few moments to sip coffee and lurk MB, and immediately I get sucked back in.

MM, I have to comment on this: “And God has promised me that He will repay!”

That is Old Testament, isn’t it? According to basic Christianity if OP repents there is nothing left of the sin. Not even a stain. In that case, as I understand it, no repaying required at all.

This has bugged me, actually. Maybe you can help me understand. If OM repents on his deathbed with his last breath, he gets into heaven, no questions asked. And he did not have to ever make amends. Does not seem fair, but what do I know.

I wonder if I could even enter heaven if OM is somehow there without ever even having said sorry for what he and FWW did to me and DS.


Patriot, and this: “Being betrayed does not give you license to kill.”

What then does the ultimate betrayal give the BS Patriot? Anything at all?

Serious question.

And if you say an opportunity to improve themselves, about half the married people in the world, and all the children hurt by adultery, are going to laugh in your face and permanently discount everything you ever say on anything, anywhere.


Sorry, back to lurking.

PS: I didn’t find it funny either, but neither do I think anyone should be offended. But then I have noticed that 10 sigma WS and FWS and all OPs have very thin skins (especially considering what they have done.)

nottoday, i am sorry that the OM in your sitch. does not leave you and your wife alone. i agree he is a totally ignorant [censored].

Hey FL,

No problem. Look, I know that it must have been upsetting to know, after my wife seeing my face and my reaction after D-Day, how easily I could have "punished" someone that she deeply cared about. In one way, it has to hurt her because she knows that she put me in the position to feel like that. But the other reason it would be upsetting is to look at me and know that short of the grace of God, I would be VERY capable of doing that. That isnt bragging or bravado...just a stated fact of who I am, what I am trained to do, and how bad I felt upon discovering what my wife and the Troll had done.

So, I would understand and do understand why a WW or FWW would be upset by this talk. I do. But these are valid feelings (as God said in the proverbs verse above) that come with being betrayed. The feelings are not bad. They are a reaction to the pain that the WS and OP have heaped upon the BS. Remember, scientists have equated the level of pain of adultery with that of someone's child dying. it is extreme. And if someone had killed my child, and I had said how I wanted to kill them or hurt them, no one would condemn me for what I said. Of course, I dont have the right to act upon that. But to say those things is very normal and even appropriate.

So, I understand you being upset. But you also need to understand that the actions of the WS bring thes types of feelings. And that to have a place such as this to vent is very good for the BS. And should be good for the FWS, as they learn exactly the devastation they have caused.

In His arms.

ok, i'm not patriot but i am curious and would like you to explain.

what does any wrong, done to any of us, give us? why do you think it is supposed to give you something? am i to get something from my brother who sexually abused me? should i vent about it, let others with similiar stories join in on the fun. does that really give us anything?

the only thing i want to get is personal growth. so you can now laugh at me and discount anything i ever say.

i don't think venting gets me anything.

and what if there is a person here who, like my brother, treated his sister incorrectly. but lets say that person is truely sorry for the pain he caused. and this person, seeing my post, feels sad and says so. should i discount his feelings so i can continue to get something out of my venting?

Nope. Remember, God says that He never changes!


Jesus paid it. In that case, then I have gained a brother. And in that case, if he has been truly saved, then he will know the depths of pain he has caused others in his life...including me. As I have learned after my repentence of all of the pain that I have caused. that alone is good enough for me. But if he doesnt repent and ask Jesus into his life, then God has said He will take care of things for me. So, either he becomes a brother or God takes care of his punishment. Either way, I am satisfied.


It isnt fair that Jesus had to pay for my sins. He did nothing wrong. You see if God was "fair" and he gave us what we deserved, every last one of us would be destroyed! Everyone of us. salvation has NOTHING to do with us or what we do...and EVERYTHING to do with Jesus and what He did. It is agape, God's kind of love. It is unmerited grace. It isnt fair...it is love. What would be "fair" for me would be for me to be able to take my wife's OM out to the woodline and take care of things. But instead, I dont get "fair." As a follower of Christ, I get to be more like Him, which means I have to want for even the Troll to be saved. And it has taken me a long time, but I have reached that point where I would actually be glad that he did.


I know the feelings, my man! Quite natural. But remember, God says that if you do not forgive the OM and FWW, then He will not forgive you. This isnt about feelings here. it is about obedience. When you get to heaven, you will be surprised by who is there...and who isnt. But once there, all of what has happened here will fall away. All of the hurts and pains...gone.



Ask Jesus. He was ultimately betrayed by EVERY ONE OF US! He was betrayed by his closest friends. Do you think He understands just an inkling of the betrayal that you and I have gone thru? Do you think we can now understand just a little what it must have felt like for Jesus to be betrayed by billions of people that He loved more than we love our wives? The answer is...you get to become more like Christ.


Then they are not serious about following Christ. And if that is the case, then they have much bigger problems than the adultery.



Dont lurk...these were great questions.

In His arms.

MM,

Please don't get me wrong. my reaction has absolutely NOTHING to do with me not wanting anything bad to be done to the OP. i have zero concern of that. of course, i did not care deeply for OP. with the exception of the OP from my college days, i cared deeply for him. but i don't now.

anyway, i do see how venting can help a BS feel better on a particular day.

trust me, i got that one figured out.

truth is, i'm just letting this thread distract me from what i should be concentrating on. i'll stop that now.

OK, may I wait for Patriot's answer first? The question is specific to him and may help me understand some interesting posts he has made elsewhere. (I see some dots that if connected may help me understand WS and OP thinking. )


BTW, I wish my FWW was trying even half as much as you FL.