I wasn't sure where to post this,so I'll start here.

Me and my wife have been married 9 years,lived together 2 years before that.She is 36 I'm 40.We have to children,ages 4 and 7.This is my second marriage,her first.
For the last 5 years,I wasn't happy and she was not happy with me because of that.I drank to much and smoked pot too much.But I always took care of the kids,cooked and helped with the household chores.
Our problem was I would not listen to her concerns with me.
We had good times,but not as many.And still had sex at least once a week.Great sex.
The last straw with me was when she was to have weight loss surgery.The night before she was to have it I said that I did not want her to have it because she would get skinny and leave me.I now realize how bad that was.
Two months ago she asked that we separate.I did not want to,but agreed to.The next day I set an appointment with an outpatient chemical dependency program.I did that for 4 weeks and stopped drinking and smoking.And I have no desire to now.Another issue she had with me was my ADHD.I got on meds for that,and,man,it changed my whole life.
We have been seperated for 2 months now,I got a place to rent 6 weeks ago.We still talk,she still loves me and misses me.And I feel the same way too.She is proud of the changes I have done,but is still scared that I might return to my old ways.I know,for myself,I won't.I am committed to these changes in my life.At first she wanted to hurry up the divorce,but now has delayed for 6 months.
I've been sending cards to her couple of times a week.We have started spending some face time together.Tomorrow we have a lunch date.
She just wants to take it slow and I can wait.
If I keep my promises of change,and I know I will,will we get back together?She tells me that she doesn't know if she still wants me or not.I am doing everything I can do to ensure that she will want me again.I will give her alot more this go around then I ever had.I just hope she will take me back.I don't know what I would do if she didn't.

Will it work out between us? single choice
	yes
	no
Votes accepted starting: 10/16/05 12:00 PM
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I couldn't answer your question in a yes or no. It could go either way. Sounds like you would benefit from some counseling. I think you have self esteem problems and you are working really hard to keep her because you are scared of being alone. You can't love someone else until you love yourself. I think you have made great strides to begin the process of loving yourself, but it all takes time. I'm glad that the divorce was postponed. I think this can work out if you both put alot of work into it, but it can also crumble if you both don't work through your issues. The comment about having "face time" together is great. I love the way you put that and I think this is the most important thing you can do. Us that time to have intimate conversations and it would be better if it wasn't in pubic i.e. a lunch date. A lunch date in private would be better. Give her time and remember that your actions speak volumes over your words. Follow through with everything you say. I think she is having serious trust issues with you and that takes time and patience to earn back. [censored] Luck and God Bless.