I have been with this men for 14 years and now he's with soemone else but I want him back. I see him all the time cause we do have kids. One thing I have noticed is that for some reason he seems to give this women alot of respect and at times can and will ingore me and she's been around for 8-9 months. How is this? Does any one have any suggest on how I can get my husband back?

I think a little more information would be helpful to assist people with giving you their opinions on the situation.

How old are kids? length of marriage? divorce, separation? what is it that you want "back" with him, nature of the breakup, history of affairs? alochol/abuse?

All of these things are important factors. At least to me...the presence of some of these factors would certainly sway my rationale of what to do.

Lem

P.S. I think you will get more responses if you open the question to all sexes....there is nothing imparticualr about your question that would lead me to believe that you will get more accuarate assessements of the situation by males answering only.

also- this is not just a question you should pose to men only. Many women here are in the same situation you are - and would be happy to share their own personal experiences.
I think you need to start a new thread with a title like:
Help! New here and need advice.

You deleted all your posts on your old thread on divorced/divorcing so we don't have much to go on.

You don't have to start a new thread to change the title, just "EDIT" your original thread title to change to a general title seeking for everyones help. Why limit the responses to men only? Besides, by my estimates, there are a ton more women here in your position way down the affair/divorce road than men. MB principles are pretty much gender nuetral.

IMO, your WH or xWH or STBXWH treats you badly because he is fogged out in a relationship with OW. Because you are so far down the path your situation will be difficult but not impossible. If you truly want to fight for your marriage you need to read everything here about Plan A and Plan B. You should order and read Surviving an Affair and His Needs/Her Needs.

More details are needed.

Mr. Wondering

I hope that is better and I am sorry that I limited it to just men.
Anyway to answer your question our kids are 11 and 13, we were together for 14 years and married 7 years out of the 14, yes we are divorced and have not been together for about 6 months, we broke up cause of my mouth I would put him down and talk to him any kind of way. YES I admit I was the abuser, no drugs had anything to do with it at all. All i want to know and I'm trying to figure out is how do I get him to give me another chance. I have talked to him and like he said he does love me and want me but he just doesn't know what to do at this point. I just love my H and I want him back home with the kids and I and just start over. I wonder all the time if he even thinks about me or misses me and if he loves me and wants to come home why not just tell the girl BYE and come back home so we can get it together? I'm lost somebody anybody please help.

9067

I have no experience with your situation so I really can not offer any help. Others will be around with perhaps the same or similiar story to offer insight and direction.

Not to mention, it is not advisable for me to chat with single women. I love my wife too much.

Good luck,

Mr. Wondering

9067....

I am not one of the veterans, but I am sure for people to help you they will need a bit more info. When did you find out about his affair(A)? Is he still living with you or is he living with the OW(other woman) or is he living in an appartment? How much do you communicate since you found out about his A?

What were the problems before the A? Who else knows about this A?

Others will have other questions. The more info you give the better people will be able to help you.

Take care of yourself....sorry you have to be here, but wellcome to MB.

Daisy