I am writing for some advice. i havea problem, i resent someone for the first time in my life, now i'm usually the type of person whom can take stuff and let it slide. i heard a preacher say "whats the point being mad at someone, when its not hurting them, they don't know your mad at them, your hurting yourself" so i have been trying to follow that. But i have been feeling resentment for my wife. and i don't know how to deal with it honestly. Let me give you a history of the situation at hand. I am a huge Ford Mustang Fan/collector of die-casts, and since we've been married ( 5 years in May will be ) my wife had said i get horse then you get a Mustang. Well the other year, she got a horse, and i said about the Mustang, she said wait until your car is paid off, fair enough , the next year my car was paid off, can i get my Mustang? Well here she all of a sudden needed a new car, (which even her uncle said it would have been cheaper to fix her old one which wasnt that bad, than buying a 11,000$ one) and she begged me to get it, i said as long as it dont effect my Mustang, and the price increased to what i can get, she said "OK" then came time again to ask and she said wait until after vacation, we need all the money we can get (fair enough was going to see my dad) then after vacation, she said what do you want more go bac k to school or Mustang? i said Mustang, so she said ok. Well i started really looking, i even figured out our bills and all, it would have been not even 100$ a month for loan. and found one, so her and i and a guy i know who knows Mustangs went to look at 2 of them. and hte first one was more and needed more work done, so that was no brainer, but the second one, the guy agreed it was the best i was to get at that cheap rate, and i test drove it, she even tested it and said see if he'd take this much, and did and yes, well we got home she started saying about affording it and this and that, even though i had it figured out that we could, then the next day went into work and called for loan got OKed and was gonna go sign papers, and she emailed me saying im leaving you if you come home with a loan. and that ended that. i was sos close and she drove it away , after her being for it...sorry for rambling but thats my story hope you understand my point..

I'm a Chevy man myself but I won't hold that against you.....lol..... Growing up I had a 1978 Chevy Camaro, black with limo tinted windows, bored out 350 with a wild cam, holley 750 double pumper on top, 411 posi-track with a hurst shift kit in the tranny..... Man, makes my mouth water to this day......

It really sounds like y'all are having a tough time with communication on this issue. I can definately relate to your frustration. I guess my initial question is "Is it economically responsible of you to go into debt for this car?" Who does your finances and how are y'all truly doing financially? You mentioned payments under $100 a month, I'm presuming that for 3 years and borrowing about 2,500. Then there's the other 10,000 grand to fix it up.

Do you have any other hobbies that are taking up $'s? I guess what I'm getting at is in the overall picture does it make good sense. To me it would make more sense to save up and buy it with cash and not go in debt over it. It would also make sense to do so only after y'all have established enough savings as an "emergency fund" (like 3 months wages) so that you wouldn't have to dip into the cookie jar.

As far as the resentment goes, I'm a little stuck on this one. I'm trying to see what her objection is and the only thing that I can come up with is that it doesn't make good financial sense to do it....... What do you think?

well i did i mention also she now has since sold the horse and holds me responsible for that sale. even though she told me to my face its cuz of the 120$ a month that was costing us. The only reason i even brought the horse up in our discusions was because that was the whole gist, once that was in the picture, then so was the Stang. And as for yor question Bill, Finances were/are fine, i was just happy with the fact that it was in my garage and i could sit in it, whether or not i had the money at them moment to fix it then and there, was not an issue at all. She had her horse and i was home with our 3 yr old daughter (which was great dont get me wrong) and i was to have the Mustang at home while she was with horse just about every day/night.

Well I guess that's where my question is then. Why did she feel the need to give up the horse because of the $120 a month it was costing y'all if finances are/were fine?

Again, who is in-charge of your fiances?

If she felt the need to give up the thing she wanted because of the financial burden then I can understand her burden of then going back into debt over the car.....