I've been married for about six months and my wife has been acting different lately. My
gut feeling is she's cheating! She's told me she needs her space and wants to go out at
least twice a week. ABout a month ago I discovered she subscribed to an online dating
service and had 8 male friends--almost all live in this area. She immediately deleted the
profile when I confronted her, but she never once apologized. i asked her about the men
(8 of them) she had listed as friends and her reply, "I really don't know any of them , which
turned out to be more than one). She told me she confided in this guy and told him how
unhappy she is in our marriage. This week alone has been a difficult one for me for these
reasons:

1. She went out for a few hours earlier this week and came back 6 hours later, close to
2am. And this happened after she called in sick to work...too sick to work, but felt good
enough to party.

2. Yesterday she basically went to work in her work clothes but changed into regular
clothes after she "went to work only to find out I'm not on the schedule..." She tried telling
me she actually came home after finding this out and changed while I was sleeping, but
her voicemail time was WAY off. Then she had an excuse that she went to work in jeans
and just brought her work clothes because she was stopping by the mall before work --
way out of her way. She then disappeared for 5-6 hours and didn't return any of my calls.
All I got was, "I didn't want to talk to nobody today..."

3. Tonight she went out of town to hang out with friends whom I've never met. She said
they're from work and when I asked for an alternate contact number incase I can't reach
her cell, I never got an answer back. I'm watching her son tonight along with my
kids...basically doing the babysitter thing :-) And she's staying overnight -- she just
called and said, "I guess I'll see you sometime tomorrow."

All that aside, I've been paying attention to her internet usage. One day she spent 16
hours online lol!!! I mean...who the ****** can sit there all dang day?? Anyway, we argue a
****** of a lot about so many things (hides her cell phone, took her car keys back from me
and told me she needed to get a duplicate made, sleeps with her cell phone sometimes,
and the list goes on......................................

My family basically told me to run for the hills asap ... our marriage is only a few months
old. BTW...I met her on the net, paid her way out here, she barely works...just hangs out
and surfs the web. Can't discuss money issues without her spazzing out... Basically can't
discuss crap without her going nuts and then telling me she has to go out with friends to
take her mind off everything at home. She's said more than once that "I'm her PROBLEM"
because I ask too many questions on where she's been, etc. She seems to talk to everyone
but me, which is weird. I mean people I've never met know more about me and our
relationship lol.. :? :?

I think you are probablyo right, this sounds like an affair. maybe just using you to get away from a situation back at her place, now looking for a new thrill.

I would take this over to the JFO section or GQII and poke around over there and see.

You could install some keylogger software on the computer to track what she's doing as well.

I've thought about a keylogger since she locks me out of her computer. I just need to figure out how to get on her computer if I really want to do this. I'm about out of energy worrying about what's going on. To sit here and tell you it's taken a toll on me mentally and physically is an understatement. Here it is 0112 and I'm still up while she's out of town partying with who knows. I have to hand it to her because she sure can make friends fast lol! She's been here four months and already spending overnights in a different city.

I feel for you. There is a slight possibility that she is not cheating. It's a chicken and egg problem after a while-- not know which started first-- the suspicion or her acting strange. You get suspicious and question her, she feels controlled and wants to get away for some breathing room. The more she tries to get away, the more you become convinced she is cheating.

Personally, I think there is no room at all for partying in a marriage. And what I mean by that is her going out partying by herself. Girl's night out on the town is fine but she should be home by 10pm or so if you ask me. She will see that as controlling but it's simply not the behavior of a married woman nor is it a healthy way to blow off steam. She needs to find healthy ways to get out her stress without and have alone time without doing things that raise red flags for you.

All I can say is that indeed you have reason to be suspicious. Personally I'd have a friend "follow" her on one of her night's out. If her account of the night matches what your friend tell you, I'd start working on yourself and realizing that your suspicion is probably pushing her away. But if she is going other places than she says she is, I'd go ahead and run for the hills like your family suggests.

There are hardware based keyloggers that just plug into the keyboard cable. No muss, no fuss.

Or you can get one of the boot CD's off the net and boot the computer off of the CD and do whatever you need to do. Lots of ways to skin the cat.