This is the worst I have seen this board. Let's get back to working on our marriages, instead of playing this little game of attacking and defending.<P>We have a lot of work to do here, guys. We have tons of newbies that are hurting, and they need us to help them, not spending our time attacking one another.<P>Let those nasty posts die, and we can get back to business.

Perhaps we could all be a little less paranoid, self-righteous, and sarcastic as well. I'm not prone to name-calling, but I let my emotions get the best of me.<P>AGAIN, I apologize for labelling PodPerson a jerk. I still think she's miguided, but my frustration boiled over and I crossed the line.<P>Mea culpa. Forgive and forget?<P>------------------<BR>/// Lone Star * ///<P>

TNT- <P>I agree with you. But I did post on Podpersons thread and gave her some biblical advice. Yu might like the read. <P>Never heard you called Tendervittles before.<BR>Unfortunately, some of the newbies are posting very inflammatory threads. They are hurting so much.<P>Just like I was. 6 months ago. <BR>God bless you.

I've been guilty too, of categorizing and that ole' self righteous attitude. I've been guilty of not being as compassionate as I should be. I've been guilty of responding to posts that keep the fire going, adding fuel - letter by letter.<P>I am sorry all you Marriage Builders! All of you who are in pain, and need healing, love and support. I really am sorry.<P>TNT

Speak the Truth in Love.<P>Maybe we should all put a post it note up on our moniters to remind us.<P>It's OK to have different opinions. It can even be OK tell someone either their actions or ideas are wrong. Or that their actions and ideas will not help them achieve their goal. That is helping and supporting each other with a wide variety of ideas and experience.<P>You cross over the line when you are either hurtful or you label them as opposed to labeling their actions. Hate the sin, love the sinner....or disagree with the action, be supportive of the person. And aren't we all just plain old wrong sometimes? I sure know I am.<P>And just in case someone forgets? Softly point out how we do things around here or just ignore it. Let's not get our panties, briefs and/or boxers in a bunch over someone's tantrum. They may need the help the most.<P>------------------<BR>Faith, Hope, Love Remain,<BR>but the greatest of these is Love.<BR>1 Corinthians 13:13

Yay TNT!!!!!<BR>The full moon was Saturday!<BR>There are people here with valid pain, desperate for help or a shoulder to cry on. When was the last time one of their threads showed 45 - 60 responses?<BR>Thank you and apologies to those who are needing real help. We all fall into it one time or another

TNT,<P>Good thoughts. Everyone here is in their own pain and it's so hard to remember that. Everyone's pain is valid.<P>Dreamer,<P>Just an FYI, but someone named Tendervittles DID post on pod person's thread. You might have missed it. I think she was responding to that person't post, not TNT's. You might want to go back and clear that up. Or, maybe not, lol.

Yeah to all of you! You are all right. I hope that we can all sit in peace and love here. We do have so much work to do.<P><P>------------------<BR>God bless you and all of us.<P>Samantha<BR>

Lark-<P>Maybe not, but I did go back and apologize for being harsh. I missed tendervittles in all the mud and blood.<P>Anyway, we do have a lot to do here and should get back to the business of building.<P>God bless.

DITTO!!<P>------------------<BR>Marriage: the most important contract you'll ever enter into, and the most sacred.<BR>

Hi Everyone -<P><BR>I guess I can be pretty good at this since I have been taught not to wear panties, briefs or boxers!!!!<P>wink-wink!!<P>Try a little touch of humor and remembering that pain is what we're here to overcome...not to inflict on others.<P>A BIG HUG to EVERYONE!!!<P>Sheba

Bringing to the top for another reminder!<BR>

11 days ago, I posted about needing a break. Some of the things I said then relate to this exact topic, so I thought I would copy part of that post here.<P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>There seems to be a rash lately of people coming to this forum for the express purpose of causing hate and discontent. I think by the very nature of us having to come to this site in the first place we already have enough of that.<BR>There also seems to be a lot of , IMO, bashing of other members going on as well. <P>It doesn't matter if the betrayer is male or female they made the same mistakes. The very fact that they have come to this forum says that they regret what pain they have caused and are looking for ways to correct things.<P>Some times the member is also an OM or OW. Just as for the betrayer, they have come to realize the pain they have caused and once again are here to learn how to repair the damage which has been caused.<P>Then there is the betrayed, who come here for solace and guidance.<P>Many times a member falls into more than one catagory. . . This fact does not make them any less of a person.<P>We are all here because of infidelity. We are all looking for answers, and yes sometimes those answers hurt just as much as the uncertainty does.<P>The constant bashing of each "group", the stereotypical assualts on men and women are getting out of hand. . .<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>We are all here for the same reasons folks. Lets try to remember that.<P>God Bless<P>

LoneStar: Sarcastic? Now who's being sarcastic? Moi? Surely not!<P>It's a gift.<P>I apologize ... somedays I just need to do that to keep from slashing my wrists!<P>

Actually, Maya, I was talking about PodPerson's sarcasm. Yours is humorous. Hers was downright insulting.<P>------------------<BR>/// Lone Star * ///<P>

IN THAT CASE .... thank you very much and I will continue inflicting my "gift" on you all!<P>You very nearly made my day!

Bringing this one back up to the top because it seems we may need yet one more reminder!!!!<P>I must say that today is quite an improvement over yesterday! <P>Yay!<BR>

Please guys, I am asking again.<P>Can WE ALL get back to working on OUR marriages, and stop replying to threads that don't do that? <P>P L E A S E !!!!!!!!!!<P>

TNT<BR>Thanks for trying so hard.<BR>I have an idea. <BR>Maybe when we feel like posting something that isn't constructive, we could look at the board and see if anyone hasn't got a reply. Maybe we could just show them we care.<BR>

WS good thought...<P>Only say that which is edifying...<P>Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.<BR>Ephesians 4:29<P>Been learning alot about our words... Do a study, and read the book "Hung by the Tongue" it shows the power to do good or harm...<P>NOONE needs a tongue lashing...I for one am going to look to my bible more often!!!<P>cozy