I approached WH about leaving his job. I did not demand i told him "I wish you would find another job, working with OW really make me so uncomfortable", his reply was "i am not leaving my job, i just got my vacation time in". i then asked him to at least think about it. He said he will think about it.

I typed up the NC letter and he is not aware of me wanting him to give this to her. How do i approach him to mail it to her, well I would like to place it in the mail for him, so i know she gets it. What if he says this is "Bull****" and not necessary. I dont want to back him in the corner.. i am a little scared of how to react or approach him now in Plan A. I also want to tell him that i want access to his cell phone (calling card cell phone) at any time i request, this is where it all surfaced. I just want to be prepared to be rejected with the NC letter. Please give any advice of what to say or do?

What if he refused to go through with it.. what do i say, without getting him frustrated?

I combined two of the NC letters that was posted on the board. Here it is:

(OW)
I have behaved in a selfish and inconsiderate way that has resulted in much pain in my family. I know that marital reconciliation with my wife is the right thing to do, but will never fully repay the heartache I have caused. I deeply care about her and want things to work out so we can focus on our family and realize all of our dreams together. I am sending this letter to confirm for you that I have reconciled with my wife. To protect her, I have decided to break off all non-professional contact with you. My relationship with you was a cruel indulgence that (W) did not deserve. While I cannot completely repay Darlene for the pain, I have caused her I will do my best to become the husband she has been missing. I care a great deal for my family and I would not want to do anything to risk their happiness. This decision - not to contact you or interact with you in any way other than as required to maintain a polite professional relationship - is permanent and not subject to change. I ask that you respect my decision, and never seek to contact me, or interact with me other than as required to maintain a polite professional relationship. I will refuse all efforts to initiate other than professional contact with me, and I will notify Darlene immediately of any contact between us, as well as alert her to any effort made to initiate additional interaction. I have been completely honest with (W)about everything that has transpired. This is essential to rebuild a trusting relationship between (W) and I, and I have committed myself to doing so.

I hope that this letter makes clear my position.


(WH)

CC: ME(W)

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think your WH is supposed to write the NC letter and you are then supposed to read and approve of it and then he is supposed to send it to her. This way HE is accountable for ending his A.

I thought i would get it togther for him or give him an example to use... with his level of education, ( and i dont down him for that) I dont think he could put it in words of what to say. He is dislexic and i have a hard time deciphering his short notes to me or what he is trying to say. He does not communicate well at all in writing.

H friend at work, who is my connection, told me i think it was last tuesday if not the tuesday before, that he text her to not bother him anymore, and to lose his number. WH has not told me of this nor have i seen this myself. Would that be his NC?? he does not know i know this.. he wont admit to PA only EA. But PA is true. Neighbors saw her car when i was gone. WH says she was never at the house even after i told him what neighbor said.

His friend also told me OW txt back that she would do anything for him that she loves him. I ask him how she is at work (dont beleive much he says) and he says since i confronted her (she denied anything happening) and told her some truth about him, she wont even look at him. But if you read my other posts, it seems something is still going on.

Should I try and tell him what a NC ?
Please dont get frustrated with me.. this is all new.. and i am just trying to get it together... there is so much that is going to be happening.. a move.. he doesnt want to come...and the baby is due in Jan.