No...not my WW's.....her's still shows no sign of abatement.

THIS ONE!

My local paper has a few more details. The press inter viewed her brother who indicated that her sister had no idea he was married when they began their relationship 2 years ago. He further stated that they bought a house together; but their relationship soured a year ago.

It's eerily similar to my situation. My wife is a RN....OM is an older anesthesiologist. My son is 8...as is her child. Hopefully the epilogue to my story won't be so awful and hopefully her daughter has a loving responsible dad to turn to.

How sad Binder.

When the flip side of love is hate, it is not love at all, nor was it ever. For love has no opposite, it is all encompassing...and cannot change to hate, or rage, or bitterness, or indifference.

Love and forgiveness are becoming topics of huge interest for me, and if I didn't have my faith in God and my D, I doubt I would have even began to grasp what it means to love at all.

Sometimes I wonder if being on an infidelity board is good for us, after we are over our own little nightmares...but then I know that the friendships we make here are something which we want to hang onto, and should.

I am sorry for that woman, her family...for him and his. How sad.

Insightful Weaver….I agree on an intellectual level….but there is a dichotomy to my love. I loved my wife……I love my children……the former continues to be a threat to the latter with her lifestyle and their subsequent exposure to her promiscuity. Paternal obligation dictates I do what I can to protect my children and it is difficult, if not impossible for me not to vilify that which threatens my offspring. I hate her actions, yes, but to separate that from the individual requires a leap of divine proportions for me. I can forgive the mortal blow to our marriage, but the monster remains in her control and preys upon the psyche and souls of my children. The state of forgiveness is elusive and, truth be known, not sought by me while the maelstrom exists. I know that monsters are hard to control and turn upon their masters as no doubt the news story illustrates. My STBX undoubtedly must face her Frankenstein one day too……I must now forgive myself too for being far to eager to witness that day of reckoning.





That is a fair question, but sometimes life is not just about self gratification or fulfillment. We as members of this big beautiful world have to, on occasion, assist others out of a personal obligation to do that which we are good at. If we can help others in the throes of the mess adultery creates, we should. Duty…….sometimes those with the gift have a duty. Still Seeking’s sig line says it well:

Hi Binder,

Another terrible tragedy.I feel badly for the child.I wonder if the father is in the picture at all? And the adultering doctor: it's amazing to me how these people lead double lives without getting caught or if other's just ignore the obvious signs.

Anything new with you these days? What's your plan?

O

Hi Miss October!

Update to that story…the doctor has died….I would imagine an anesthesiologist would know what to give himself to ensure an inevitable death.

What’s new with me? Well…STBXWW turned 42 yesterday…..2 years ago to the day I culminated 3 days of no sleep, hidden recording devices, a PI and some computer sleuthing with a alcohol fueled confrontation at her staff Christmas party (OM there) . Subsequent to that a yelling match all the way home and my vasovagel collapse in our hallway.

Fast forward 2 years and I am waiting for the divorce….heck I’m pushing for it. Her lawyer is dragging her feet on some simple administrative tasks stalling the D to try and leverage a different parenting arrangement. (Remember I have the children half of the time, but every weekend) It’s petty, and simply delays the inevitable and makes it slightly more expensive for me as a motion may have to be filed to force their hand.

Other than that I am well! I look forward to rediscovering myself as a single man. So my short term plan is to finalize the divorce, and my long term plan is to make this home the children’s primary residence. That plan is not to punish my STBX, but because this is the best environment for them…..and I miss them to bits when they’re not here.

I also look forward to dating, but for the life of me cannot imagine getting married again. I know enough never to say never, but for the sake of my children I will not be introducing them to any romantic interests and confusing them any more than they already are.

How about you O

What is it with Dr.s' when they are in an affaire? Something similar happened yrs ago again married nurse begins an affair with a married DR. she thinking they will be together divorces her husband, he decides to stay married to his wife, she geys tired of waiting for him and tell him so, he tells strings her along for a while and finally she gives up and starts to date, he livid, stalks her, with out her knowing this, she stills go to him for her b-shots,he gives her one that burns she questions him as to what was in the needle he lies she buys the lie she starts to get sickly, turns out that he gave her s ahot full of the AIDS virus......he is convicted and sentence to jail.

Hiya Binder~

I passed my 2 year mark too without much fanfare. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />Yuk. I too am awaiting the end of this D process.I had a major stall a couple months ago.All our Mediation agreements fell through,we each retained respective Lawyers and everything turned real ugly,like in the movies. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> But,I woke up one day,said my prayers and like a clarity I haven't known in some time,I knew I had to call my WH and talk.So,from then on,we are back on track,things look good withstanding and I am hopeful to be done with all this very soon.I truly feel God was telling me that was what I needed to do and it worked.

I am sorry you collapsed in the hallway.It's so stressful dealing with all this isn't it? I had an episode too,right in the middle of a restaurant with my In-Laws and children and other family members.How totally embarrassing <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />.My WH was with homewrecker at the time and he said he was on the phone and I was so distraught but my In-Laws thought we could go out to eat dinner but at the place, the room started to spin as I was up getting my dinner(buffet) and then BAM,on the floor.I was hysterical and don't remember too much but a nice fireman carried me to my chair.Ugh that was an awful time for me and my FIL wanted to literally KILL my WH.

I am also looking forward to my future.I am having a grand time being with my girls and fixing up my home and being with friends.I remember seeing your picture with your kids on the MB Photo album and they looked SO cute.You just must love them to pieces!

I cannot imagine getting married again either unless there were a guarantee that I would never be D'd again.lol No,really,I just don't think about it since it would be a monumental decision to do again after all this.Too scared.I'm with you on protecting the kids from other "interests" for some time.My girls are already very attuned to other men and what do they want with their mom(i.e. who was that man who called mom??!! What did he want?) Just the firewood delivery man sweetpea,etc.lol

So glad you are well!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

See you around~

O