I am writing, ashamed as I was the WS. Now I'm the spouse looking for support as the separation continues, and the future is foggy. I am out of my fog, not communicating with the OP and hoping and praying that there is a possible future with my S.

My S has entered the stage of little if NC with me, trying to let go as it was stated that they want to move on. The word divorce is never used, it's always 'move on'. I'm trying to back away and do what they have requested of me to just let them alone. I have nothing but love to give to my S and give back for everything I once took away from the marriage. I receive mixed feedback from my S. One day ignoring me, the next asking me questions about the 'why', and restating that they just can't have a relationship with me. I know my S still loves me deeply. And the times we do get together, while rare, are very emotional. We hug, we talk, we spend hours together, again wile rare, full of mixed emotions and messages.

I know that they are trying to build the strength to let go completely, by ignoring me now. I understand that. But they have also stated that they are still confused of what they want. It's ironic, but I know deserved, that I know what I want, so clearly and will do anything I can to preserve and try to build on the love that does remain between us. I know that we could get through this. I know it's not completely up to me, but I'm here with open arms.

Just looking for support, as I try to keep my focus on what my S is going through, and what they need from me.

sadinthecity

It sounds as if we are in the same boat. I am always reading what's on the MB and getting advice from the articles. I have tried to deal with LB's. DH doesn't want to fill out the questionnaire, so I try to actually hear what he has said or is saying to me about my behavior. It seems to be going better, but with the seperation we have little person to person contact. All I can say is to hang in there, come here for the support and advice. It will take a while, but I am hopeful. Don't give up! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

sad - Welcome to MB. There is lots of info on this site (not just discussion forums) and I hope you will take full advantage and read it. Also, you may want to post on the "General Questions II" board, as this Divorced board MAY be a little premature for your situation.