thanks for confirming... i hope i have enough time for plan a to work before dec 1st

I know it seem radical thinking no contact, no phone calls– cause you want this man and you love this man, but you need to think of you and your baby. I am not saying you throw him out of your life, I am saying get on with your life hon and let him initiate contact, there by giving you the upper hand to set the tone when he does. I mean if you can not get him to work with you right now to save this marriage–all you are doing is opening yourself up for hurt, and right now you have your baby and you to think of first. I am glad to hear you are moving near to his mother so you have help at hand. Ultimately you can not make him come back to you–and you can not force him to stay and work on the marriage either. He is obviously in the fog, as I have heard other refer to it. This does not mean that you should give up hope either. And I do understand your concerns of his thinking you have moved on, but I think you have made it very clear to him that you want to save your marriage. Letting him go now hon, is not giving him permission to do what it is that he is doing if he is still doing it. What you told him is that you love him and want to save your marriage, letting him go is telling him you also love yourself and you deserve better than this.


dh is darling husband most days, these days as friends have contributed, it stands for damn husband! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

thanks sleepless,
i am so happy i found MB forum. everyone is making sense of my world right for me... We are not going to be together for thanksgiving. I am going to his moms, and he does not want to go there. I wonder if he is going to OW, who lives with her mom. I wonder if i call OW mom again (haven't spoke to her after night i went there for confrontation..wasnt a bad scene.. just awkward)and just give her an update of what he so-called admitted to me so far and to see if she knows anything.. she did tell me that if anything is going on, she does not approve of it.

K what I am learning thus far is that you should basically shout it at the top of your lungs so if you feel comfortable then I would do so. She is after all the OW's mother and they say to tell.

I am glad of the advice to “tell” been feeling bad cause I did tell–back before I found MB. Friends, family and employees–with his “memory loss” he left me in a position of having to tell--of course sad news is most of em knew and weren’t telling me because they didn’t want me to divorce him. Which means they under estimate just how much I love him which is probably a good clue that all is/ was not right in our marriage now that I consider this.

Hugs,