I need help in knocking some sense into my brothers head. He has been with his gf for 8yrs now. Things were good up until 2yrs ago when their son was born. His gf LOVES to party. She will come up with every excuse in the book so she can go out. One day she called my neices up on 5 different occasions w/ excuses to watch him. We dont mind watching him but she probably has maybe had her kid a total of 3 days out of this whole year.
Fast forward to about a month ago. She called me up and asked if i'd watch their son so she could go and take care of some student loan things. I said alright but dont be long bc I had to be somewhere at 2. She was back on time. Well later that day I found out she was about a half hour putting down her security deposit on her apartment. That next day she took the brand new bed my brother bought and their sons bed she was even so stingy and took the curtains which she found out didnt fit on the windows. My brother has a pretty good paying job makes about 50,000 + a year, he has NOTHING to show for it this year. She spent every last dime. SHe put him 3 months behind on bills and he had to borrow the money off my mom which she didnt mind (after all its her son) Friday i went out with my brother havent been out with him since my 21st birthday. We listened to a band at my sisters bar and i just drank some soda while he drank beer and he had a good time. Well, later that night my mom came over and boy did ****** hit the ceiling. He started crying that she left him and all this other stuff. I know where he is coming from i know it hurts but he keeps taking her back. I understand that they wanna work it out, they are in consueling. This past Thursday she called my brother and said I dont want our son, I dont want anything to do with him, i'll pay the child support. I was like what kind of mother are you?! She dropped him off but came back about a hour later and said she was wrong. Well my brother went to her apartment between Friday and today. She is living with another man which he says she isnt. He has found numerous numbers in her cell phone of different guys. He even found a number from a guy from a hotel room. I know he is hurting, I hate seeing this. He isnt eating, sleeping. Our whole family is just terrifed (we lost a brother this year long complicated story) we just hate seeing him like this but he keeps taking her back and doesnt believe anything anyone tells him. I know i dont have any room to talk bc my FWH had a ONS and obviously I am taking him back but I hate to see this happening to my brother. He is just so confused he doesnt know what to do. My brother told me i was stupid for working things out with my husband and now he goes i know where you are coming im sorry i talked bad about you. Its just hard. I've told him about this website but i dont know if he's even looked anything up. Any help?? Suggestions??

Just keep trying to encourage him to come here. Sounds like your bro picked a winner. But there is a child involved so he needs to take things slowly and put the child's interests even above his own. I know you are angry with his GF and you should be. It is natural to want to protect your brother's heart.

But he has to decide what to do and how to go about it. Please tell him to come post here and read. We'll try to help him in ways that you, as a concerned sister, might not be able to do.

~ Snow

Thanks Snow I'll try and do my best. I also forgot to mention that where she got her apartment at is about a half hour drive from where he lives. The week she got her apartment somebody was shot and killed and last week a six yr old boy was shot and killed about 2 blocks from her apartment. His gfs dad told her to get a gun to protect herself. Isnt that child endangerment? Isnt there some kind of order that he can have to make her not live there? All states are different i know that. Also i know its not normal for a little 2yr old boy to tell me that santa is gunna kill him? Something is wrong here. Its just a sad situation.