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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 255
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okay guys, I need advice. My H's cousin and kids are here and I was doing some cooking in the kitchen. Our son wakes up from his nap, H goes and gets him, invites everyone (BUT ME) to go outside and plow snow with him. Am I wrong to feel belittled here? I know that there is not enough room for all of us, but a respectful acknowledgement of my existance would have been nice! How about sorry honey, there isn't enough room for all of us, do you mind if we go out and plow? Grrrr.

I would like advice on how to approach w/o LBing.
I am also venting, thanks for listening!!

Joined: Oct 2005
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So let me get this right. You have a nice quiet home right now. No kids running around screaming and you'd rather by plowing snow???? Isn't snow the reason people run away and move to the god-forsaken state of texas????

Just maybe he thinks he is doing you a favor???

An idea for you. Next time before he leaves, speak up and ask to go along. If there is no room then volunteer to stay back but bargain for his time when he returns. Just say out loud to him that you'll stay behind but it's your turn with Dad when they return.

Sorry I do not know your whole story so I may be way off and I am trying to be helpful and NOT sarcastic (sometimes the written word can be misinterpreted).

Mr. Wondering


FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
Joined: Aug 2002
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It may also be the case that he noticed you were cooking and thought you wouldn't be able to go. You can bring this up to him pleasantly without making a big deal out of it-just, "I was disappointed you didn't ask me to go along to snow plow earlier. I would have liked to have gone." If he says, "You were cooking, there wasn't room, etc" just add, "Yeah but it's nice to be asked." He's more likely to pay attention to what you say if you keep it short and don't make assumptions about his motives.


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