Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all."

Additionally,

A fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great, (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "AMERICA" in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wisher."

(Disclaimer: By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is
warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher who assumes no responsibility for any unintended emotional stress these greetings may bring to those not caught up in the holiday spirit.)

-ol' 2long

I'll get back to you after my lawyer translates this for me.

SS

Shouldn't this read PC HOLIDAY Wishes?? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Signed,

Ashamed and embarrassed Massachusetts citizen

I loved it - I am e-mailing that one. Thanks 2long. and Happy non secular Holidays

That's a good one 2long, especially coming from you.

This is the part I want (this means money right?), not for myself but for that credit card hanging out in my wallet.

It's taken such a beating this year...poor thing. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

And Merry Christmas (or whatever) to you and yours as well 2long. Sorry you don't have any snow to help you get in the spirit, but we have enough now for all of us. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

weaver, you little greedy capitalist pig! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

anywho, to all my cute little MB chica's: Merry Christmas and GOD BLESS TEXAS!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Didn't I see George Carlin give this monologue a few days ago on HBO? Is he stealing your material?

10S:

Quite probably! Sounds like something Carlin would do. I got it in an email, stripped of any source credits like those things often are.

So, if George Carlin truly is the source of that, then by golly thanks, and Merry Christmas 2 George!

-ol' 2long

This was *almost* as good as hearing the politically-correct "Twas the night before a non-denominational winter holiday" reading done by Larry the Cable Guy on Blue Collar TV the other night.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />......oops, showing my redneck tendencies..... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

Merry *whatever* to all of you!

2Long -

I am afraid you have disappointed me!

No fewer than 3 (count'um, 3) times did you make reference to a "holiday". Obvsiously, you are insensitive, mis-informed and a mean-spirited bigot who is prejudiced against those who don't believe in such a "holiday".

Allow me to enlighten you:

(From Wikipedia):

"The word holiday has related but different meanings in English-speaking countries. Based on the Old English words holy and day (halig dæg), holidays originally represented special religious days."

Furthermore..."holy" (which is a root word of the aforementioned "holiday") means:

"Holiness means the state of being holy, that is, set apart for the worship or service of God or gods. It is most usually ascribed to people, but can be and often is ascribed to objects, times, or places.

The concept is found in almost all religions, especially those with a degree of formal organization, so that there is scope for special people, places etc to be devoted to worship.

In non-specialist contexts, the term "holy" is used in a more general way, to refer to someone or something that is associated with a divine power, such as water used for Baptism."

2Long - I trust that in the future you will be more careful in choosing your words and not be so insensitive!!

Meanwhile....allow me to just say this one last thing:

MERRY CHRISTMAS !!!!!!

And a blessed Advent season to you, too.