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Pebbles Offline OP
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Sigh...it seems there may be a spy lurking. Will delete, even though I didn't post anything too important. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Thanks, TA and Neak, for your replies. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Last edited by Pebbles; 12/27/05 08:24 PM.

Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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Pebbles

Glad to hear you gpt through your stbx-free Christmas in good order. Your son is entitled to be listened to, and frankly I don't see why stbx's desire to have a relationship with his son should be done on stbx's terms rather than your son's. Good luck with the legal stuff.

Note: I'm posting at about 2am here in the UK. Tonight, we had a family outing to see King Kong, part of which is set in New York. This is one of the many places H had a holiday (disguised as 'training') with OW4. I spent most of the movie examining the carpet and meticulously thinking through the plot of the book I'm reading. H really enjoyed the movie, which makes me wonder if it brought back good memories of his illicit trip. How come I've been walking the streets crying for hours, while he's in bed, perfectly OK? Why isn't he crying?

This time of year is such a b*mmer for the betrayed of the world.

TA


"Integrity is telling myself the truth. And honesty is telling the truth to other people." - Spencer Johnson
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Pebbles Offline OP
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Post deleted for security reasons. Wow, makes me sound almost important, LOL. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Last edited by Pebbles; 12/27/05 01:41 AM.

Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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Merry Christmas, Pebs & TA.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Pebbles--
Can I pipe in with a question here. You said:

All child care must be approved by both of us, and I most vehemently do not approve of my children being left alone with her!

Will this apply after the Divorce is final, too? What about if (big if) WH and OW get married?

I am trying to see what I can do to keep OW away from my kids when D is final. I know IF they remarry I have no choice, but I hope I am reading what you wrote correctly--at least they may not be able to be alone with her.


BW-me, 29
XH, 29
3 sons-now 6,4,2
Divorce final--Sept. 27, 2006.


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Pebbles Offline OP
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Hi, intexas.

When (not if!!) we are divorced and MOW and WH marry, she will be allowed full access to my children. Nothing I can do.

Until they marry, she can see them in his presence, but they cannot be left alone with her for 6 hours or more.

I'm in California, not much I can do about limiting access to the OW.

I hope you are more successful in keeping your OW away from your kids. Some states are more helpful to the BS.

Edited to add: WH has left the children alone with her for a couple hours at a time. Nothing I can do, according to my lawyer, unless she is a proven sex offender or drug abuser. Just being a skankylosaur doesn't count, sadly.

Last edited by Pebbles; 12/27/05 01:46 AM.

Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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six hours, huh? Too long. See, my boys are 4, 2 and soon to be born. Six hours is enough time to do damage IMHO.

I will talking to the lawyer a lot about this. I will do all I can, including prolonging the D proceedings.


BW-me, 29
XH, 29
3 sons-now 6,4,2
Divorce final--Sept. 27, 2006.


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intexas, unfortunately, it was the very best my lawyer could get for me. She said I was lucky to get that stipulation. I hope it works out better for you.

Oh, I'll reply on your thread, since this one is destined to die a slow, painful death, LOL.

Last edited by Pebbles; 12/27/05 02:08 AM.

Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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I can't let your thread die without saying Hi!, Pebbles <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I hope you are well.

Gimble


-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect.
-An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
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Gimble!!! Hi! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I hope you are well, too.

I am okay. Better than okay. Thank you. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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I just had to add: if MOW finally gets divorced and she and STBX do get married, that will be my ultimate revenge. Mwaahaahaahaa!!! The two of them joined together in unholy matrimony until further cheating do them part.

And I don't care if the spy reads this. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Must go to bed now. Too much vacation time on my hands could get me into trouble, LOL.

Edited to add a beautiful quote borrowed from Neak's thread:
Quote
Keep your courage and faith, and you will eventually leave the Valley of Shadow for the green pastures not far ahead. Your trials in the shadow will prepare you to enjoy the peace in store for you.
That's what I'm working toward. Thanks, Neak, for reminding me.


Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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To the 'spy' that don't see staight:

Pay attention, listen closely and sit up straight. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Now stay real still.... SLAP!!!

U think we don't know Y u r here? Well if you are gonna spy, at least learn how to check out your ENs and don't LB all over the place. Let u in on a 'secret', affairs can't have POJA and RH. R u getting all this or does it need to be translated? LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

L.

Last edited by Orchid; 12/27/05 04:14 AM.
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Thanks, Orchid. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

The following message is approved for spy viewing, and normal people, too.

I just had the kids for the day, since STBX had to work. I didn't think I'd get to see them at all this week, but I'll have them Thursday, too, and maybe another day, depending on how many days STBX decides to work. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Just before STBX came to pick them up, the two children sat on my lap together, one on each of my legs. Mind you, DS is 14-1/2, 3 inches taller than I am and 20 pounds heavier. DD is tiny, but all legs and bony elbows, LOL. They were arguing over "who loves Mommy more" and squirming around. Sometimes, life is really, really good.

If you're reading this, spy, please let STBX know it wouldn't hurt him to hug his kids once in a while. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Edited to add: I probably should be irritated at being STBX's on-call babysitting service. The court order states he is supposed to give me at least 24 hours notice if he needs to change his visitation. Also, I did have plans for some of the days this week - I am on vacation. But...I'd much rather have the kids with me than with you-know-who. Besides, I know the kids didn't want to stay at the lair all week...and I looove them. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Last edited by Pebbles; 12/27/05 08:29 PM.

Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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Pebbles, question on my thread.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Neak, did I miss the question?

Just my luck, I go out for Chinese food and miss all the fun. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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In case you did, I just asked how did you know? I am amazed and awed. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Maybe answer on mine? Or if you can't answer, that's ok too.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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It's like Watson questioning Holmes at the end of the story to find out how he reached his brilliant conclusion.


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Oooohhh, duh! (smacking self on forehead) I get it now. I try not to think too deeply while I'm on vacation, LOL.

I'll answer here. When I was talking to my son last night, he mentioned some things his dad said that led me to believe either his dad or an agent on his behalf has been reading my posts. I can't be sure, but it was too coincidental to be mere coincidence, if you know what I mean. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Maybe I'm just being paranoid. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />


Me 40, STBXWH 43 Married 16 years D-day 01/25/05 Son 14, Daughter 10 Divorce almost final - I hope!
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Ahhhhhhhh. It seems so simple when you explain it.

Hi Spy! *waving*


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
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Hey Pebbles.. just had to drop by to wish you a very GOOD NEW YEAR's!

And you're still my inspiration! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

~A


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