I need help in resolving conflict in my slowly dying marraige. My husden refuses to see that his selfishness is hurting our relationship. We have been married for 22 years,and 4 kids. I have tryed to talk to him about his spending "his" money on himself, buying new car, motercycle,restroing old cars, ect. I have suggested that "his" money would be a big help in taking care of the kids and the household. His reply to me is this " You have a job, the kids are yours, you can take care of these things. You don't need my money. This is our biggest fight that never gets solved. The problem is that he is selfish. And he won't admit it. He has left me drained. Please help <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

I don't know the answer but I have a husband that is also selfish in similar ways. I would love to see what other's have to say.

I am having a somewhat similar problem. I have been with my husband for approximately 7 years now. We have 2 daughters together, a 3 and a 4 year old. He is selfish too! In a marriage you are supposed to share. I do not think that their should be any "Oh! I made the money so it is my money!" kind of attitude. This is being selfish and unfair. It should be considered both of your money. I believe that in a marriage when it comes to finances that it is perfectly normal to have joint bank and credit card accounts. Regardless of who makes what money it should be shared. Unfortunately when it comes to a person being selfish with money in a marriage I do not know how to resolve this issue. I am still trying to figure out this one myself. I do think that you both should share your money equally. I do not think that it is fair if you have to spend all of your money on the house and children while your husband spends money on vehicles.