I haven't been on this board since April 2005. Just to summarize my situation, I discovered that my stbx husband had a 2 years affair with a stripper in Las Vegas in October 2004. He was the one asking for the divorce because he was in the fog. We went to 3 months of marriage counseling to try to save the marriage. He moved out in December 2004. Since then I started dating again. When I became intimate with my first boyfriend, all my feelings for my stbx were completely gone. My life for the past year has been enriched with new and exciting experiences with a few relationships. These past relationships (although it didn't last) have reconfirmed my feelings for my stbx husband. I filed for divorce in October 2005. Hopefully I will be free by this summer. It's funny though, now that my stbx is out of the fog, he wants to stay married and has been very cooperative financially. Unfortunately, the feelings are gone and the marriage is over. I felt as though I just woke up from a long boring sleep all these years. Sometimes a bad thing generates good side effects. Without his affair, I would have stayed in a boring marriage for the rest of my life and I would never have the opportunity and the courage to leave.

Sorry to ask ... what is your take on Harley's position that in Love feeling could be created ?. what are your children take in the future if they found out that you have cheated while M and didn't want to keep the family together ?. Last, he is willing to let go your infidelity and maybe learn from his mistake and be a good husband ... would you let that go to a lucky lady (his next w) ?.

-rh-