I am writing this post to thank the many many wonderful people who have travelled with me, diwscussed and at times debated, consoled and shared over the past few months.
I have come to understand that some of my views are very diffferent to those held by many in society.
And how wonderful that is too, what a boring world if we all thought the same.
There are beautiful people here each of us trying to walk our own journey and understand this complex world.
Many many of my discussions/debates were around the issue of porn , womens worth in the world and the way we are judged.
I have come to the decsion that it is best for me to depart this board. It is not because my believfs differ that I leave but because the many justifications for porn use are not good for me right now. However I do thank these men and women for sharing.
Today when I read a post by a mother who told me she wished she didnt have stretch marks I finally realisied that perhaps I am one of the only people in the world who truely believes that ideals are manufactured by the media and that each and every one of us is perfect in EVERY way....It really hurt me to think that women are rejecting parts of their body in this way is not helpful to me at this point in time.
Like I said there are wonderful people here and I wish each and every one of you well.
Thanks you all again for your kindness and support. LMJS

I would like to tell you THANK YOU for your debate with stillovingher. Even though you are choosing to leave, the words you both exchanged were RIGHT ON.

His argument I have heard from my husband and your point of view is that of mine. This is such a difficult topic. I appreciate both of you speaking up for all of us.

LMJS:

I just want to wish you well. It's obvious you have been deeply, deeply wounded by your husband's abuse. I belive he abused porn to his own detriment. But what is much, much worse, is that he used the porn to then abuse YOU.

I understand why you despise the entire porn industry. You are certainly not alone in your views, and I would imagine you will be able to find an outlet for that. There must be groups out there that are fighting porn, or at least trying to counter some of its detrimental effects.

However, I feel compelled to point out that not all men who use and abuse porn go on to treat their wives so abusively. As you know, my H had a problem with porn. And while it did contribute to the wedge between us... he has never, ever made derogitory comments about my body. In fact, lately, he can't get enough of it -- stretch marks and all.

A lot of people here may disagree with you about porn in general. But many of those same people would be more than willing, I am sure, to help you and support you through your marital and/or personal recovery if you ever decide to come back.

All my best to you LMJS. May you once again find peace and happiness.

--SC

I couldn't agree more.