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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 3
B
Junior Member
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 3
NEED ADVICE PLEASE!
MY HUSBAND LOOKS MORE THAN 3 SECONDS, GETS WET IN THE PAINT,
RIGHT? THIS IS WHEN I AM WITH HIM. MAKES YOU WONDER
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU'RE NOT THERE. HE JUST DENIES IT
BUT I WANT IT TO STOP. MAKES YOU FEEL BELITTLED, LIKE I AM NOT ATTRACTIVE ENOUGH THAT HE HAS TO LOOK AT OTHERS. I KNOW THIS IS NOT TRUE, I FEEL GOOD ABOUT MY APPEARANCE BUT FEEL AWFUL THAT HE DOES THIS. IT'S SO EMBARRASSING.

Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 668
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 668
First, all caps means you are screaming. Is this your intention?

Second, I am trying to understand your post, but are you saying that your husband looks at other women while he is with you? What does it mean to "get wet in the paint"? Big enemy of communication is him simply outright denying anything without some explanation. Conversely, him explaining and you outright not listening is also an enemy of communication. That should get addressed first I would think. Something to set up the ability to have discussions about what is ok and not ok(the setting of boundaries).

Open communication is the key

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 3
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 3
To explain "get wet in the paint," I meant you look with lust because it's not a glance, it's a continual stare; and yes, in my presence.

Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Quote
HE JUST DENIES IT
BUT I WANT IT TO STOP.

You can't control what he does/thinks/says --- but you sure as heck can have some influence <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

NEXT time he is with you getting "wet in the paint" .... you take his head in both your hands---

you look him straight in the eye and you say to him in your best sultry voice:

"I want you to make love to me."

then plant a big huge *kiss* on his mouth

then keep walking

just for fun .... give it a try

Let your H associate YOU with lust and desire


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