I left the nc letter on his desk this morn. Why didn't he stay away from me, out of my path. He didn't exchange many words when we passed but the looks. I was ok until then, ready to face this and pretend he is dead. When does it stop feeling this way. I'll almost crazy with this. I want to go away, far away so I never ever see OM again!

It takes a while. Be patient. This is just the beginning. Be strong.

Stay strong, smfry. You'll get to the point where his "looks" don't mean a thing.

I would think Om would stay clear of me, I made it clear and I know he got it. As if he is trying to intimidate me into changing my mind! I have this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. the kind you get when you wish you never did something. I feel really low of myself right now. Then I have to see om. I've done the avoid walk the other way thing, why won't he?

Because he has been having his needs met by you - he still wants that. He is attempting to manipulate you. If he can make you feel bad, maybe you will change your mind. BUT - you ARE stronger then that!!!! Remember why you are ending this - why NO CONTACT is good!!

smfry13- You are doing GREAT!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Hang tough and do not give in to him. He is trying to manipulate you. As long as he thinks he is getting to you, he will not stop.

Don't let him see you crack, not for one second. Yes, come here and vent if needed. Don't forget to turn to your BS for help. After all you and your spouse are a team in this together. Don't feel as though you should carry all the load alone. You will need your husbands support as you step through this one day at a time.

I am totally in the dark about your sitch. I take it that you work with OM. Have you considered finding another job.

Smfry13, I also think you’re doing great! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> The emotions you’re going through now are normal and you’re doing just fine under the circumstances. Just hang in there and continue to search for another job. As soon as you can start complete NC with OM, you can start your recovery process and start to fully withdraw from him. With time and patience, this WILL get better. (I’ve been there myself so I know!) The fact that you still feel this way towards OM is totally normal and there is nothing wrong with you. With time, patience and continuous NC the feelings will eventually wear off. Remember, the problem is not with the feelings we experience (which is often not controllable), but whether we act on those feelings or not.

Here is the link to my withdrawal guide (just click on the link).

Please note I’ve also send you a message on your other thread yesterday. Here is a link to my post. Just in case you’ve missed it!

Keep posting and coming here to vent and seek guidance, support & advice.

Blessings and take care,
Suzet

Smfry, another thing…while searching for another job, you may find the following thread helpful:

Guidelines: How to do NC at work

Smfry, is there a possibility for a transfer to another department/building? Maybe you can discuss this with your supervisor/head? If this can be accomplished it will be very helpful – the less you ‘bump’ into OM, the better… It will also give you more peace of mind and reduce the anxious feelings you currently have if you can move to a department/building where you don’t have to often see or bump into OM.

Smfry, where are you? Please post and let us know how things are with you - we are concerned! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />