.......I was moving on and doing great, all of a sudden I found myself thinking about my ex a lot yesterday. It was her birthday. Lots of thoughts and emotions. I thought about how excited she would get about what I had bought her for her birthday. The excitement of going out and celebrating together. Heck, I think I looked forward to her birthdays as much as she did. Yesterday I thought about last year, when she was hiding her A from me....denial, denial, denial and I was trying as hard as I could, without the benefit of MB'ers to make everything alright. I thought about what she was doing to celebrate her birthday this year. I wondered if she even thought about me at all and if she missed the princess treatment I would give her on her birthdays.
I never imagined that yesterday would be a trigger. I expected the holidays and our anniversary last year to be a trigger, but this one totally slipped up on me.
Oh well, I guess it is just part of the process. Its funny.....I thought God had healed me up pretty well. And while I still think that, I become more cognizant of the healing yet to take place as time goes on.

Greif is a cyclical process ... you cycle through the stages and sometime skipping a stage going to the next one. Healthy greiving is when you feel better each time you revisit the stage ... until it doesn't impact you emotionally.

You sound like moving and cycling ... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

-rh-

redhat,
Pretty good analysis. I really havent thought much about the grieving process, but I do know it gets better everyday for the most part.
I also like your sig line. That is exactly what I feel. Did all I can do.
Its funny I feel like I am getting more comfortable by the day in being single. I am feel fortunate that my elderly parents are counting on me more and more as time passes. It fills such a void for me in that I feel so needed. It really is nice to be needed by them. So, when these triggers slip up on me I try to focus upon all that is right and good in my world. And there is a lot.

You are doin good. You are healing. Those triggers would not impact you in the future ... you would look at it as non event and distant memories.

-rh-

It really does get better. I am almost 3 years post divorce, and there are actually a few days where I do not think about my X during the day. At first, I thought about him ALL the time....constantly replaying things: the past, what happened, what I could have done different, etc. There were many triggers at first.....now, the only thing that can really set me off is not getting my child support...LOL...Even thoughts of the OW, now his wife, do not bother me.
Hang in there!
KK