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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
J
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Junior Member
J Offline
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR THE ALL CAPS, I MAYBE SCREAMING BUT NOT BEING RUDE. WITH MY DISABILITY IT IS A LIL MORE CONVENIENT FOR ME.

> I LEFT MY HUSBAND IN APRIL OF 05 DUE TO ABUSE
> (verbal,emotional,physical)-NEGLECT-MENTAL CRUELTY-LACK OF LOYALTY
> AND RESPECT.
>
> WE WERE TOGETHER 10 YEARS ALL TOGETHER...I TRIED SO HARD TO WORK
> THROUGH ALL OUR PROBLEMS BUT THE MORE I CHANGED THE WORST IT GOT AND
> ONE DAY I WOKE UP AND REALIZED I DID NOT KNOW ME ANYMORE AND THAT
> NOTHING WAS EVER GOING TO CHANGE FOR US AND I WOULD HAVE TO MAKE A
> CHANGE AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE.
>
> I LOVED MY HUSBAND EVEN AS I KISSED HIM GOODBYE THAT DAY IN APRIL
> THAT I PACKED UP A UHAUL AND DROVE TO FLORIDA, I WAS DEVASTATED, HE
> PROMISED TO CHANGE AND I FELT IF HE COULD DO IT ON HIS OWN THEN
> MAYBE I COULD BELIEVE HIM AGAIN.....
>
> WELL HE CHANGED ALRIGHT...HE LOST HIS JOB ,HE HAD BEEN USING DRUGS
> FOR SOMETIME I FOUND OUT IN SEPTEMBER OF 05,THE WOMEN IN OUR HOME
> THE LIES.
>
> WE HAD A WRITTEN AGREEMENT FOR SPOUSAL SUPPORT-HE HAD NEVER HAD ANY
> ISSUES WITH MONEY OR TAKING CARE OF ME THE WHOLE TIME WE WERE
> TOGETHER. I ACTUALLY MADE MORE MONEY BEFORE MY DISABILITY.
>
> I HAVE LUPUS-FIBROMYALGIA-DEPRESSION WHICH I RECEIVE SS DISABILITY.
>
> I'M IN THE STATE OF FLORIDA AND NOW SINCE WE HAVE BEEN APART I CAN
> DIVORCE HIM.
>
> I AM HOMELESS AND LIVING WITH FRIENDS OF MINE FROM CHURCH.
>
> YES HE SENT SOME MONEY BUT SINCE I HAVE BEEN HERE IN APRIL I HAVE
> BEEN EVICTED TWICE DUE TO NOT BEING ABLE TO PAY RENT-HE LIVES RENT
> FREE WITH HIS MOM. I TRIED WORKING AND IT BECAME ENTIRELY TOO MUCH
> AFTER A COUPLE OF MONTHS.
>
> DOES ANYONE KNOW ANYTHING I CAN DO TO GET COURT ORDERED SPOUSAL
> SUPPORT TAKEN OUT OF HIS PAYCHECK?
>
> HE WORKS AT THE SAME PLACE AS MY SISTER'S HUSBAND AND HE REFUSES TO
> CALL,SEND MONEY OR EVEN PUT ME ON THE HEALTH INSURANCE UNTIL MY
> MEDICARE KICKS IN.
>
> I HAVE NOT BEEN COPING WELL AND HAVE IDEALIZED SUICIDE AS MY ONLY
> OPTION, I HAVE ALSO BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH A MILD FORM OF MANIC-
> DEPRESSION, BUT CAN'T GET ON MEDS FOR ANY OF MY HEALTH ISSUES
> BECAUSE I HAVE NO WAY TO PAY.
>
> I CAN'T STAY WITH THESE WONDERFUL PEOPLE FOREVER-I NEED TO GET SOME
> HELP TO GET BACK ON MY FEET.
>
> MY FAMILY LOVES ME BUT THEY HAVE NOTHING FINANCIALLY TO OFFER,NOR IS
> THERE ANYPLACE FOR ME TO STAY WITH THEM IN PENNSYLVANIA.
>
> MY IN-LAWS DON'T SPEAK TO ME- THEY HATED ME FROM THE BEGINNING-HIS
> MOM ADMITTED SEVERAL YEARS AGO THAT SHE WAS JEALOUS OF OUR
> RELATIONSHIP TO HIM BECAUSE WE TRAVELED AND ENJOYED LIFE WITH EACH
> OTHER. WONDERFUL MOTHER, I KNOW!!!
>
> PLEASE I FEEL SO ALONE AND OUT OF RESOURCES, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO
> DO OR HOW TO BEGIN TO GET BACK ON MY FEET.
>
> FINANCIALLY HE WAS ALWAYS AN EXCELLENT PROVIDER-AFTER I LEFT HE STOP
> PAYING BILLS. LET OUR HOUSE FORECLOSE-SPENT OUR BONDS AND CASHED OUT
> MY RETIREMENT FUND THAT I WORKED VERY HARD TO HAVE AS I DID ALL THE
> THINGS IN MY LIFE, I HAD NO IDEA ABOUT THE DRUGS BEFORE I LEFT AND
> WE ONLY SEPERATED AT FIRST...A PART OF ME WISHED
> HE WOULD GET HIMSELF TOGETHER AND TAKE A STAND FOR OUR
> MARRIAGE!!!! THAT DID NOT HAPPEN

WHY AM I PAYING FOR JUST LOVING A MAN?...
[color:"pink"] [/color]

Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
N
Member
Member
N Offline
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
If you have thoughts of suicide, you need to seek counseling immediately. In many areas, there are Women's crisis centers who can help you find the resources you need.

You left and you expect your husband to support you. This sounds like entitlement mentality to me. Talk to someone who can help you. Your church can probably help you find someone.


It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
J
Junior Member
Junior Member
J Offline
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT NEWLY.

I LEFT MY HUSBAND AFTER MANY YEARS OF ABUSE AND TRYING OVER & OVER AGAIN TO NO AVAIL TO HELP HIM WITH HIS ISSUES.

IF ENTITLEMENT MENTALITY IS MY ONLY CRIME HERE THEN SO BE IT, I WAS A GOOD WIFE EVEN AT MY OWN EXPENSE TO MY HUSBAND!!!

I TRIED TO BE OPEN AND HONEST HOPING SOMEONE WOULD LEND ME SOME HELPFUL ADVICE OR ATLEAST A WORD OF ENCOURAGEMENT.

YOU MUST BE THE WEBSITE PSYCHIATRIST, WELL I WASN'T LOOKING FOR A DIAGNOSIS, BUT THANKS FOR THE FREE EVALUATION!!

Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
N
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Member
N Offline
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
Don't miss the main point. Get to a counselor.


It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
J
Junior Member
Junior Member
J Offline
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
I HAVE ALREADY BEEN TO A COUNSELOR...RIGHT NOW GOD IS SUSTAINING ME!!!!!

NOW IF YOU HAVE NOTHING ELSE TO SAY.....FIND SOMEONE ELSE THAT CAN USE YOUR USELESS ADVICE OR INSENSITIVE ATTITUDE.

YOU MISSED THE POINT:STOP MAKING JUDGEMENT CALLS AGAINST OTHERS.

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 90
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Posts: 90
Hi J

(((((((((((((((((((((((((BIGHUG))))))))))))))))))))))

I don't really know what to tell you to help, but...........at least stay on here as much as you can and talk about what you are going through as much as you can.

You may feel alone but I'm sure others have been in your shoes..........take care.


The latter will be greater than the past.
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
J
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J Offline
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Posts: 7
Thanks 123go, You don't know how much I needed that.

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 90
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You are very welcome. I know well what it is like to feel desperate.


The latter will be greater than the past.
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
B
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
Have you gone to the social services department in Florida? They may be able to help you with subsidized housing.

Also go to legal aid, and see about filing for support from your husband.

Good luck.

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 90
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Posts: 90
Hi J........how are you doing.........just letting you know that I'm thinking of you. Hope all is well!

And since I'm here I may as well give you another ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((BIGHUG)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

....some days we can never get too many of those.


The latter will be greater than the past.
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
J
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Junior Member
J Offline
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
Thanks I'm currently trying to pursue section 8 or subsidized rent but I live in S. Florida and with the hurricanes and the housing market so crazy there is some astronomical waiting list.

I'm going to look into Hud, I know they do rent subsidies, you pay like 30% percent of your income, not sure of the program.

I wil call legal aid in the morning.

Your advice is greatly appreciated!!!!!!!

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
J
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Junior Member
J Offline
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 7
((((((((((hugs for you too)))))))))), WHY NOT SHARE THE LOVE,****** GIVE EVERYONE A HUG. THANKS 123

Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 22
C
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Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 22
I don't know what to tell you, Accept that I care and I will be praying for you. I was so glad to here you say God is sustaining you-He works in wonderful ways as shown by the friends from your church. You are right I agree it is not entitlement, you were there for him your whole marriage even through his pathetic excuse for a life. Counseling is good for the soul, but most importantly, you need to get a case manager or someone who can get you finiancial assistance. I wonder if there is an organization that can connect you with other gov't agencies?

Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 90
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I hope things are better today.


The latter will be greater than the past.

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