anyone have a WS with an in-home business? WH has been living with OW for 2 months. i'm in Plan A and trying to connect with him when he's here to work on computers (once a week). but if it should come to Plan B, then how should i structure that? should i allow him access to the house? should i change the locks? should i have him remove all the inventory from here? (OW would LB on him a lot if he had to move it to her place, cause she's a clean freak and there's a lot of parts all over while he's working on machines, but then he wouldn't be here for me to Plan A anymore. besides which, if i tell him to pack everything, he would probably get mad and file for D.)

so far, exposure has not worked to break up the A, and now he's trying to sideline me cause she's jealous. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />
looking for ideas...

Does his work bring money in that provides for your home? If not then his stuff should go to the street on garbage day (give him advanced warning first). He has made it clear that he won't respect you by openly living with the OW, so make your feelings about that clear by cleaning house. You can't Plan B if he is going to work from your home and then go to her at nights.

Hopeful,
he has a day job and this is in addition to that. so, no it's not the only source of our income (i work too), but it does help when the month is longer than the money.
also, it would take a large U-Haul to get it all out of here. i guess i could make him take it to her garage...
i'm weighing options and looking for ideas at this point.

Plan A is working somewhat (unless i get sidelined). i guess i should see how often he comes over from now on and take it from there. afraid to go to Plan B so soon (it's only been 2 months).
cgw

Um. She WANTED him @ her house, right?

Then why isn't she dealing with his stuff?

Your husband has been sitting on a fence between you 2 so long I'm surprised he doesn't have splinters in his throat.

What happened with dealing with him last night? Did they blow up at each other? Did you find out? I'm on pins and needles........

;-)

- Kimmy

With his obvious disrespect towards you and your M he needs a wake-up call. Give him a reasonable deadline to get his stuff out or it'll be tossed. He needs to know and see what he is doing. It won't really hit him as long as he can safely call your place "his office". Make him realize just what is going on when he can no longer come over because of work.

Dealan-de,
yesterday, he said it would take a "long conversation" and he didn't have time to talk at that moment...sigh. i did call him today on lunch (5 min convo) and that's when he mentioned that he & OW had a talk and that "he can't hold her to a higher standard than he holds himself" my reverse babble was "but you're SUPPOSED to sleep with your wife!"
i'm calling him later to meet him for supper. i think i can "keep him on the hook" in spite of what she says (SF is one of his top needs) and add to his guilt.

but if i tell him to take his stuff, then he'll be gone and i won't be able to keep doing Plan A...
no real reason for him to keep coming over. he ignores the 15 yr old when his IS around. the other two are out of the house.
cgw (Pat)

Hopeful,
yes, that would be "tough love"...and eventually, i will. but do you think it's time yet when i'm still in Plan A?
cgw

I don't think it's *quite* time yet.

I do think a nice hickey on his collar bone is in order (or somewhere else that would normally be covered by clothing.

BE SAFE! I'm scared of her as I am of the OW in our lives. They are blechy tarts!

Dealan-de,
thanks for your concern. yeah, OW is pretty icky.
only advantage i have is that she's not having anymore kids.
hope those grandkids come to live with her/them. that would be helpful to the situation!
still trying to figure out how to have more "face time" instead of less. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
will work on the hickey!
cgw (Pat)