Greetings All.

I have only posted a few times here. In the beginning I was reading all of the posts, and keeping up really well...but as time passed, and my H and I drifted farther apart, I kind of lost touch with the board.

He and I have been separated by 2000 miles since August. This was a forced separation by him, called Law School.

Finally, last night, we had a real and frank discussion about the future (or lack there of) of our marriage. We both determined it was over, and had been for a long time.

While I've known that this was coming for some time, the end is harder than I thought it would be. There are things that I know have to be done. Logistics that have to be worked out, but waking up this morning knowing that my marriage is REALLY over is a hard thing.

I have been in IC for some time. IC says that I am doing well, and I agree.

My H and I discussed how we hope to remain friends. We haven't even argued in the last few months. Not even enough passion for a good fight, I suppose. I have been in Withdrawal for a long time. We are planning on having a "family conference" at which we will tell both sets of parents at the same time.

What do ya'll think about that?

We are hoping that by doing that we will show them that there is no anger between us. And that we hope that we can each continue to have the friendships that have developed with each of our in-laws.

We don't have any children, which I now sincerely thank God.

We mutually agreed that no legal action would be taken until the end of this Spring semester. That would give him the opportunity to find a job and save up some money.

I know this is kind of long, and I don't know that I've really said anything. But I just wanted to put this out there.

I guess I just didn't really know how hard it would be. It is more painful than I imagined. At the end of the day, I know this divorce is what is going to be the best for me, but I'm like a kid who doesn't want to take his medicine. Sometimes the medicine doesn't taste good.

MP

How so ?

-rh-

I think it is the only chance that I will ever have for happiness in a relationship. While I am well aware that we are responsible for our own happiness, it sure helps to have someone on your side occassionally.

My H and I have been married for 6.5 years. All of those have been filled with verbal and emotional abuse. A near daily torrent of insults and hurtful words hurled my way. The last five years have added occassional physical abuse to the picture.

I decided that I had to end it. It had to stop. And the only way to guarantee that my H was never going to treat me like that again, was for me to not be married to him anymore.

For more complete story see
my initial post .

No kids, a lots of hurts, one side working on M ... I would walk away too.

Pretty much you have to seek and enjoy yourself first before you bring in someone else. If you are hurting, you will bring the hurt into your R. Take a good care of yourself.

-rh-