Because the hypocrite LIVES IN PAST and IN DENIAL by nature and they really haven't let go, regardless of what cute little slogan their profile signatures state.

Pathetic.. I asked a legitimate question relating to recovery and it becomes a holier than thou pissing contest..

I should't have come back here and will leave once this thread is over..

You all have proven my point....

Except for BluntGirl.. I liker her style.. and thanks for getting my back..

LOL... a virtual gang fight.. what a world we've created...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

2 wrongs don't make a right and all that jazz....

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

WHO CALLED ME A DIRT DUD???

DEMS are FIGHTING WORDS...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

oh dear lord..give me strength...


I wasnt actually 'getting your back', Earth...

you were rude....


and you got the same in return....


2 wrongs do not make a right....


regarding the actual topic, re-read Low Orbits post and take from it the good information that you can....

as I suggested, either be civil, or ignore....what matters...your wifes love and respect, or blood on your hands?

I'll address the original post....I think the topic is worthy of hearing other's responses

What do the WS expect if the BS runs into the OP?

I can't imagine that the WS would attempt to say 'act civil'...I think civility would be an expectation that I personally would bring to the situation..meaning I respect myself far too much to ever go to blows or call names. (I think this would be very different if I were provoked.)

Now my initiall reaction might be to WANT to initiate a full blown cat fight or throw an insult...I can think about it can't I?

I've had to face the OP a number of times....not by choice. I saw her just yesterday. I think this is where the rubber meets the road for your character. This, for me, was very empowering. I am the better person in this situation...I don't have to prove anything to this woman. I pity her and her future. For me that's better than swollen knuckles or a hand full of her ratty 80's style hair. (ok ok I stooped a little on that dig...I'm human.) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

A mumber of us tried to post helpful information and suggestions to you in the past. Each time you bashed the poster. Why? Because they did not give you the suggestion you wanted to hear.

Anytime someone is contradictory to your own thoughts, you resort to name calling. You really have quite the reputation. In fact you had to change yoru original posting name becaue you were such a jerk with your original posts.

When someone points out that you are on the MB forums, yet you refuse to accept or believe the MB principles, you act like child who has had his toy snatched by a bully.

As for your question . . .
You keep coming here saying your wife's most recent A that was not really an A that you refuse to expose because it was not really an A is over, yet you call your wife a WS. Interesting.

Most of us who have a spouse who has been wayward, we call them the FWS. Are you sure her A is over?

If I were to meet my FWS's FOW on the street, I would like to claw her eyes out. However, I have too much respect for myself, my FWS, and my marriage to lowere myself is such a manner.

I do have that respect for myself, my husband and my marriage. If you are continuing to call your wife a ws when the affair is over, that tends to show a lack of respect on your part. Do you respect yourself, your wife, or your marriage?

If you do, you should be able to put that above any selfish desires you have.

I'm sure you'll bash me and be a jerk to me about this post just as you have every other time I posted to you.

Your additude really has not endeared you to anyone here. I sincerely hope this is not the same type attitude you exhibit to your wife. I ceratainly hope you show her more respect than you have to others who have a differing opinion from the know-it-all Earthman you play here.

Thank you HP...

Your post and comments on a real world situation and your approach towards getting "above" the situation is to be commended.

thanks,
EM

EARTHMAN ANSWERS IN CAPS

Number of us tried to post helpful information and suggestions to you in the past. Each time you bashed the poster. Why? Because they did not give you the suggestion you wanted to hear.
BECAUSE I DISAGREED WITH THE ADVICE AND DARED TO CHALLENGED THE MB BIBLE OF EXPOSING... IT BECAME A PILE ON.. AND BASHING IS FUN TO ME AND HELPS TO BLOW OFF STEAM...

THINK OF ME AS THE DON RICKLES OF THE MB BOARDS.... ;-)

Anytime someone is contradictory to your own thoughts, you resort to name calling. You really have quite the reputation. In fact you had to change yoru original posting name becaue you were such a jerk with your original posts.

I CHANGED MY ORIGINAL NAME BECAUSE I WANTED TO CHANGE THE ENERGY OF MY ELEMENT.. ****EDIT******

When someone points out that you are on the MB forums, yet you refuse to accept or believe the MB principles, you act like child who has had his toy snatched by a bully.

I CHALLENGE SOME OF THE PRINCIPLES AND HAVE SEEN FIRST HAND HOW SOME WORK AND SOME DON'T. SO WHAT? I SUPPOSE YOU FOLLOW EVERYTHING SOMEONE ELSE TELLS YOU 100% BY THE BOOK...

OH, ARE YOU INTERESTED IN SOME NICE LAND IN FLORIDA??? ;-)

As for your question . . .

You keep coming here saying your wife's most recent A that was not really an A that you refuse to expose because it was not really an A is over, yet you call your wife a WS. Interesting.

I REFUSE "D" TO EXPOSE. IT'S NOT ON THE TABLE ANYMORE. LET IT GO... IF YOU READ THE OLDER THREADS, YOU WOULD SEE THAT THERE ACTUALLY WAS A PA (ONS) WITH ANOTHER OM, NOT THE EMAIL JERK. ONE'S REALITY IS NEVER WHAT IT SEEMS.. EY?

Most of us who have a spouse who has been wayward, we call them the FWS. Are you sure her A is over?

YES. 150% SURE.. AND CONFIRMED IN MORE WAYS THAN I CARE TO DEVULDGE HERE.. OK.. I MEANT FWS.. I TREAT IT AKIN TO AA.. SHE WAS, NOT IS A WS.. OK?

If I were to meet my FWS's FOW on the street, I would like to claw her eyes out. However, I have too much respect for myself, my FWS, and my marriage to lowere myself is such a manner.

I do have that respect for myself, my husband and my marriage. If you are continuing to call your wife a ws when the affair is over, that tends to show a lack of respect on your part. Do you respect yourself, your wife, or your marriage?

YOU'RE OVERANALYZING.. DO I RESPECT MY WIFE AND OUR M?? LOOK AT MY THREADS. I'VE LIVED THROUGH SERIOUS MENTAL ILLNESS, AN AFFAIR, BOLEMIA, STEALING, DRINKING AND ALL KINDS OF BAD STUFF AND I'M STILL HERE.. READING THE BOOKS, ON THIS BOARD, IN MC, IN IC, BACK TO CHURCH.. AND REBUILDING OUR M.. SO YEAH... I'M ALL ABOUT THE M.

DO I RESPECT HER? WELL.. WHAT CAN I SAY.. I SUFFERED THE WORST PAIN I'VE EVER FELT OVER HER ACTIONS.. THE BETRAYAL ASPECT HAS BEEN MORE PAINFUL FOR ME THAN THE DEATH OF MY FATHER, THE ONLY OTHER PAINFUL EXPERIENCE IN MY LIFE. I STILL LOVE HER AND WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH HER... AND SHE'S COMING AROUND, JUST LIKE MB'S SAID SHE WOULD.. SO NOW I'M DRIVING.. BUT NOTHING CHANGED UNTIL I DID... THE ONLY ISSUE THAT LIES NOW IS FEAR.. FEAR OF WHAT COULD HAPPEN AGAIN IF I STOP THE MONITORING... FEAR OF FEAR.. FEAR OF ANOTHER MAJOR MENTAL BREAKDOWN... YOU PEOPLE HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH MORE COMPLICATED THINGS CAN GET WITH AN A AND MENTAL ILLNESS.. CLINICAL MENTAL ILLNESS... NTH DEGREES APART IMHO..

If you do, you should be able to put that above any selfish desires you have.

I'm sure you'll bash me and be a jerk to me about this post just as you have every other time I posted to you.

Your additude really has not endeared you to anyone here. I sincerely hope this is not the same type attitude you exhibit to your wife. I ceratainly hope you show her more respect than you have to others who have a differing opinion from the know-it-all Earthman you play here. [/quote] <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

MY W GETS ALL THE LOVE AND RESPECT A PERSON CAN GET.... I JUST VENT HERE... PLAYING.. AND THE MORE YOU GUYS GET PISSED OFF.. THE BIGGER KICK I GET.. IT'S HOW I DEAL WITH THE PAIN.. GET IT?? DON'T TAKE IT SO PERSONAL... LIKE ******** IS A WORD GETTING ALL BENT OUT OF SHAPE OVER.. SILLY...

"You agree, through your use of this service, that you will not use this BB to post any material which is knowingly false and/or defamatory, inaccurate, abusive, vulgar, hateful, harassing, obscene, profane, threatening, invasive of a person's privacy, or otherwise violative of any law."



if 'bashing' people is how you get your kicks...you should probably discuss this with your councellor...he/she could suggest less confrontational ways for you to get through the pain of betrayal....

and no, you're not Don Rickles...he used humour....you use offensive and vulgar language.....the 'in-your-face' attitude is abrasive and condecending....

you are putting up barriers to your own healng with this 'tough-guy' attitude....

Well Earth Man...I don't think you are such a bad guy.
Your 'bark is worse than your bite'.
I have not read any of your previous posts and don't intend to. This is about this thread and how you are NOW in your marriage recovery.

Those of us that have never had a mental illness cannot
understand where you come from.

But as Bluntgirl said, it would be best to use KIND words
instead of offensive words. You seem to be the sort of guy that when you have inside HURTING, you lash out with Hurtful Words. Is that kinda right?

When you (or others) are provoked, it is natural to get defensive, YET you need to rise above this. (I know it is HARD.)

Earth Man, here at MB, we hear you much much LOUDER when you speak SOFTLY & KINDLY and share what is inside your hurting heart.

Keep posting. It sounds like things are much better with
your FORMER unfaithful wife.

Oh boy.. aren't we just a tad too serious BuntGirl?? Phew..

The disclaimer is subjective... and I'm protected under the first amendment.. read it...

AFTR, Don Rickles was the KING of insulting humor sweetie... that's why I used the reference.. GET IT??

lighten up... life is short...

the tough guy attitude is a joke.. what part of that don't you get.. it's not who I am in the real world.. contrary to what you think, typing on your keyboard to complete strangers is NOT the real world and I would hope and pray that people are getting professional help if they really need it...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

no, bluntgirl, you don't understand. You said that I was "nasty" for pointing out that EM had been nasty in the past.Using that standard, then YOU are nasty for saying I was nasty. I was using your own standard. Which is a ridiculous standard. You can't point to a single sentence I have written here that was "nasty." For that, you get beat with a hypocrisy stick for not realizing you just got hoisted on your own petard. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


It was not my intention to respond to his question. I am not obligated to respond to his question.

It was my intention to warn others that he can be very nasty and hateful. It is not "rude" to point that out, it is a FACT that everyone except you seems to know.


Petty in your opinion, but that is ok, because that makes us even, doesn''t it? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Not the purpose or goals of MarriageBuilders Forums!

This is a SUPPORT site for those attempting to rebuild or strengthen their marriage.

Please reread the TOS or find a forum that better suits your needs.

I actually have to deal with the (c)OW on a regular basis. I choose to take the high road with her because I am a. infinitly more classy and refined; and b. I got my man and he realizes what a low down dirty waste of money and air she really is.

But lemmee tell you it wasn't always as easy as it is now.