Hi. In addition to "Surviving and Affair" and "His Needs Her Needs", I've also gotten a lot out of a couple of other books and wanted to recommend them.

- "Every Man's Marriage", by Arterburn and Stoeker
- "A Man's Role In the Home", by Tony Evans.

The first is one of the best books that I've ever read. We men are asked to think hard about how we've trampled our wives' spirit (in my case that's certainly true), and how to treat them like the precious gifts they are. If each of us had treated his wife this way our marriage would never have gone off the tracks. If already-BH in Plan A were to treat our WWs this way it would be an effective Plan A.

Doesn't matter if it's difficult to implement in an already-troubled relationship; we still need to put it into action. It's a doing book - a call to action. You don't read it, you live it.

The Evans book is only about 50 pages but very powerful. Can easily read it in an evening. Short but deep; about what we are called to do in our marriages.

I've just started this one:
- "How One of You can Bring the Two of You Together, Breakthrough Strategies to Resolve Your Conflicts and Reignite Your Love", by Susan Page. Looks very promising. It's more tactically-oriented than the two above, and not written from the male perspective.

One of my FWW's concerns had been that my self-improvements could be only temporary. I'm thinking my reading these books - which are about me and my heart rather than about her infidelity - has helped my FWW see how committed I am to do all I can to make our M better. That may have contributed to her change of heart for the better? (BTW there's no intention to manipulate her. I'm not reading them to affect her; just to make myself a better person.)

Feel free if anyone wants to add other book recommendations.

Good luck to us all.