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Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 285
Member
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Member
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 285 |
I don't know where to really start it's been a couple of years since I've been here. My husband had an affair 5 years ago and we tried to work it through. I forgave him but I don't think he can forgive himself.
He is also an alcoholic and a pot smoker (huge one) and I don't want to live like that anymore. On top of that I was diagnosed with MS in February 2005. I'm not sad and I'm not torn apart like I was 5 years ago, just wanted someone who has or is going through the same thing to hear me.
Thanks
DDay: May 9, 2001
DDay#2: July 4, 2001
So So Recovery since July 20, 2001
Real recovery: December 2, 2001
Married: 12 years
WS: 42 yrs
Me: 38 yrs
3Ch. 2 D's(20 & 14) S(10)
I'm starting to smell the roses....
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 158
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Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 158 |
Dear Heart,
I'm so sorry you are suffering.
I had an affair, and I wanted so badly for us to recover.
I understand what you mean about your H not forgiving himself. You see all of the pain and hurt you have brought to your relationship, and it's hard to not hate yourself. The substance absue, I'm sure, plays a role. It's difficult to recover when there are other issues like substance abuse going on.
I will pray for you and your family. I can suggest Alanon as a resource. It will help you let go and help you really understand that you can't control or change the situation.
Hang in there!
Cis
Me - far from a perfect person - but trying to improve all the time
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