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traicionado,
For the record, I agree with cc. You are trying to control the situation. How? By screaming at the enabling woman at your threshold. That's easy to see isn't it? You cannot protect WW from herself. If she wants to break NC she will find a way, with or without enabling woman.
Moreover, remember the lesson you had just learned from cc? You have to concentrate on making yourself happy. It sounds like gemela going to play golf without you made you unhappy. If it didn't okay, but it surely sounded like it. You wouldn't have gone by yourself, but she did. Is that not an expression of unhappiness?
Your normally sound logic is flawed today my friend. Now don't take that personally and don't get defensive. Or stubborn for that matter. Yes, stubborn.
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But my shouting match with Evil Woman was six months ago. How can I do anything about that now? Kinda hard to go back six months in time and change it...
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cc
"Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience"
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Okay sorry, the time frame was lost on me. I will go back to lurking status now...
And what about gemela playing golf without you?
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take a break Traicionado. Go out on your bike, get in contact with nature. You need it
Last edited by cc46; 04/17/06 08:29 AM.
cc
"Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience"
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Okay I will take your advice and get back to nature. Right now I am about to go out and hunt birdies and eagles.
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whatever. Tell Gemela you need some time to yourself, with yourself. Kindly.
Take in some nature. Feel life.
let me know how it turns out.
cc
"Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience"
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Well I did not find any eagles but I got a birdie and a couple of pars. The rest was bogey and above. Only lost one ball and that is good for playing at night!
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cc
"Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience"
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T, I didn't like to say anything because I'm the FWW and it could have been misconstrued but all but the others have said it so I'll chime in as well.
I do get the feeling that you do always need to be in control. I know there's quite an age difference between you but you are not gemela's father.
Had enough 2x4s for today? You're doing fine really.
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KiwiJ,
I guess you need to swing a little harder because I am still missing something fundamental. What exactly am I doing wrong? Is asking about NC really that bad? I read so many other threads where people are checking phone records, internet records, etc. to see if NC is being broken. I don't do any of those things. I just asked the question and accept what WW says at her word. I thought I was being less controlling but I guess I am not. This is what I am missing and everyone is being too subtle. My skull is pretty thick. Can you please change to a 4x4 so I might finally get the message? Swing away please. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />
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You're not doing anything wrong - it's just a gut feeling I get. Not the checking up, not the asking about NC, just a feeling that maybe gemela feels she's not quite in your intellectual league or something like that. I'm sure you don't put her down but you may come across to her as always knowing best and knowing what's best for her.
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Yesterday I made the comment that gemela was obsessing about golf.
Yesterday I watched my latest Desperate Housewives. In the closing voice over, they were talking about Brie and said the surest way to cure an addiction was to replace it with another one.
I wonder if maybe it is not related...
All is quiet here.
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Well, if she's obsessing about golf she's not obsessing about the OM. That's a good thing if you ask me.
I've given up smoking (over a month now whoopee) I don't think I've replaced it with anything. Unless it's that nervous tic I now have. (j/k).
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Hey, Traic...
What did you say to gemela exactly?
LA
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Thanks KiwiJ. You are getting weak though. You don't thump very hard.
Without sounding defensive I don't feel that describes our relationship. I am far better at math. No question. Other than that I respect and listen to everything she says and ask her opinion before making decisions. With regard to finances, I ask but she shows no interest. Generally I don't go against what she suggests because she usually has good ideas and thinks things through. I always thought of gemela as being more mature than me - at least until now. Now I am not so sure - I am confused anyway.
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What did you say to gemela exactly? When?
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Well, if she's obsessing about golf she's not obsessing about the OM. That's a good thing if you ask me. Well that's what they said on Desperate Housewives.
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That's good if it doesn't describe your relationship. I guess I'm putting 2 and 2 together (your ages) and making 5. So that's that little theory of mine shot to pieces.
I never thump hard. I try, but they're always nerf thumps.
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I never felt older than gemela and she never felt younger than me until about the last year. This topic came up every once in a while and it was always the same answer. Now she thinks differently. I still haven't changed my feeling - not yet anyway. I think she may be less mature than I give her credit for. I just don't know. Those questions will not be answered for a while.
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