How do you deal with the fact that the affair is continuing?
Being still married and seperated, at times I feel it's more difficult to deal with than when we were under the same roof. Always wondering where he is and if he's with the OW. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> Is there a remedy for the pain and deception that I'm feeling, or will time heal?

I'm sure it is more difficult to deal with. Is there any way that you can get back under the same roof?

Have you read the "How to Survive Infidelity" section of this site?

I tried to stay under the same roof, but his comings and goings made it more difficult for me to cope---and not to mention everything he told me was a lie. I had caught him in so many lies when we were together that I began to have anxiety attacks, it just wasn't healthy for me.
I am trying to use the time to re <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />gain my strength again, but it's the emotional void that I'm feeling and the lonliness that is difficult to cope with.
thanks for your advise, and I will read the suggested. I have been reading any information I can get my hands on.
thank you again

Kim,

Sorry you are having to experience this. We BS and FBS here really understand what you are going thru and this is a good place for you to come for support and advice.

Yes, do read the free material on the MB site and I also suggest you order the Surviving an Affair book. It will help you better understand some of the things that are common to affairs and it will also help you develop your plan to end the affair and save your marriage.

It is important to remember that all marriages can not be saved and some of them probably shouldn't be. Either way, this site and the book will help you to get thru this.

You may want to post some more information about your situation here such as how long you have been married, how long the affair has been going on, when you discovered it, if you have any children, is OW married, and if so have you exposed the affair to her husband.

Good luck to you, remember you are not alone.

Who

Some more information on my situation:
I found out abou the affair 02/01/06, while paying the cell phone bill. He claims the affair has been going on about 2 months??? We have been married 9 years, but together for 15. H has 2 children from his previous marriage whom are grown and do not live in the area.
The OW, who is 22 years his junior had been with the father of her 4yo, but has now moved into an apartment, which is where I caught him last week.
H claims he does not spend that much time with the OW, but from what I've read, and emotional affair is just as damaging as an actual sexual affair.
He is still my husband, but I feel helpless being away from him. I feel like it's "out of sight, out of mind".
He has been going to Counseling, I guess that's a +. It's the fear of the unknown when you thought your future was already predesigned.
I appreciate the support and suggestions.

Hi Kim,

Post your questions under General Questions II there are a lot of people out there that may help you, who are in or have been in similar situations.

Regards
Chris

I'm in the same boat. I'm sorry and I feel your pain.
It's driving me nuts!