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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 8
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 8 |
My exh cheated on me, divorced me (I haven't even seen the papers), made up really nasty stories about me. It's been 3 years after the divorce. Now, out of the blue he wants to start talking again. I feel very confused. Should I talk to him? Tell him go to ******?
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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 921
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Member
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 921 |
He probably has found his "dream world" isn't so dreamy after all... So, he is looking back and thinking about you.
Protect your heart.. He may pull you back in until someone else comes along. Don't fall for it.
If he wants you back, and you want him... Then he needs to prove himself worthy.
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 8
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 8 |
Thank you BHINWI. Sometimes I wonder if I'd like him back, but I've been hurt too much. I haven't been able to have a healthy relationship since then. I haven't seen a councelor, mostly because I landed in another country because of my work. But my friends were a great support for me. But it still hurts and I blame myself that I didn't cared well enough for my marriage, that maybe if I did something different maybe my exh wouldn't start cheating on me 2 weeks after our wedding (his during-our-marriage-fiancee told me he was bragging about that...)
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Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 630
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Member
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 630 |
What does he want to talk about?
Ask him that question, directly.
You never saw the divorce papers???
Nothing you did would have changed an ex who started cheating 2 weeks after the marriage began.
Your description of him makes him sound like a guy who should be 100% away from you. You need a good counselor, not another go-around with the ex.
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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 2
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 2 |
There is nothing you did to cause your xH to cheat on you. There is nothing you could have done differently to prevent your xH from cheating on you. He is 100% responsible for that, Okay?
I hear that your lonely, and I know how hard that is. But no, there is no reason to talk to him. You'd just be opening yourself up to more pain.
So, stay strong, and away from this guy.
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 8
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 8 |
Yes, I've never seen the papers. At this time I got a position at a university in a different state and I moved. I gave him my new address and he must have misspelled it, or something, so I just didn't gat the papers. He just sent me an email one day saying that the meeting in the court was the next day in the morning and there was no way I could make it. Later on I found out that we "mutually agreed" to divorce and there was "no fault" on either of the sides.
I could have filed for dividing assets, but there was very little money to split and we didn't have a house, etc, so I thought I would save myself from seeing him and going through ******. It wasn't worth it. And today I'm glad I did it this way and I think I made the right decision...
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Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 363
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Member
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 363 |
You should check whether you are really divorced and get a copy of the papers.
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