Peach, please check out the latest on my thread. Apparently WH wants a jury trial. Jean36 said you went through this. Any lawyer types are welcome to chime in, too.

Thanks!

bump

Which Peach?

Hey SM...

I had a few trials w/my wxh. First two were about his lack of support...his m.o. was to force me into accepting whatever he offered and thus....to apply pressure, he used financial pressures on me. Did't pay CS or alimony for several mos...and we took him to c ourt as he was in contempt of the separation agreement which was legally drawn up by our attny's.

Never got to a full court/jury trial...they don't do jury I think for family court. Just the judge. But the peanut gallery with the attendees? They were the ones totally shocked with the antics/actions of my wxh.

First time I was in court was of all days valentine's day. My lawyer did NOT inform me of some recent gathered info as it provided the courtroom with me crying...might not have if it were not sudden she said. He/she (two attorneys) agreed it was best. And when they showed that on that very day, while we were in court, he had purchased over the weekend 1)lingerie (hundreds of dollars at vickie's secret) and 2)that multiple flower deliveries (two to be in fact) went out...one to ow1 and the other to his present w. they also showed that a few weeks prior, he spent over 30k in one weekend in vegas while I was being served with an eviction notice...

It was NOT pretty...the facts my lawyer showed. And I did cry, but very controlled with just tears falling down my face.

When the lawyer would ask my wxh about "now darth, is it true that you spent x amount at x place in vegas? why did you spend that much? did it occur to you that you had NOT paid your cs or alimony? did it occur to you that your stbxw (me) was placed in dire financial straits b/c of your choice to not provide for your child or for her?"

The court just gasped. When they revealed the dirt, people just gasped and sighed AUDIBLY. Darth heard it.

The judge ruled both times in my favor...but it was so expensive to get there...but was worth it.

Taught darth a lesson...to NOT pay me will wind him up in jail.

As I left first court appearance on valentine's day, you'dve thought I was the champion prize fighter leaving the ring...I got slapped on back many many times. People saying "god bless you and your child" and many kind utterances as I walked out...got several "give em ****** girl" from admirers too.

When darth with his attorneys walked out? He got BOO'd. Sure did. People swore at him. Some called him an a hole. Others called him "deadbeat dad" and others called him a lying cheater. He got called all the names I wanted to call him at the time. But I did not do it. Complete strangers did. One very kind person said loudly to him as he walked out "you'd better turn back to the sin and turn your face to the Lord"...obviously he didn't pay attention to that.

I wouldn't worry. IF your stbxh wants it, give it to him. He does NOT KNOW WHAT HE'S GETTING THOUGH...Georgia is a FAULT STATE...and you have grounds...you have emotional cruelty, abandonment, and adultery. Get a bulldog and it's over. He's lost.

You can email me btw. univofmtiger@yahoo.com

Hi, Justpeachy. Thanks for sharing your story. Are you SURE they don't do jury trial for divorce? I got a copy of the letter WH's attorney sent to the judge requesting to be on the civil jury calendar.

Neither one of us could afford a jury trial. I can't really afford things the way they're going now. It's so hard not to worry. So hard not to freak out. The deadline for him answering all my Qs and producing the documents is sometime next week, so I've got a whole week to freak out.

Sounds as if his lawyer is using fact of an impending trial as a NEGATIVE MOTIVATOR...or bait to get you to settle with your wh.

and if you go to court, have things properly documented...his affair, his lack of parental caring...his willingly abandoning his home, etc...all of that, he'd lose custody and have to pay out the ying yang.

i'd see it to the end. let THEM SWEAT IT...you're in a different position than one I was in. My xh could afford a courtroom hearing all day long....it was ME who could not.

In your sitch, NEITHER of you two could...and that's the beauty of it. don't play into their game. he's trying to get out and get out easy. plus you can angle for him to pay attorney fees.

they all try to get you on court day to settle btw...settlew without having the judge to intervene...judge will only intervene if you all can't come to an agreement.

simply sounds like a legal maneuver to me to make you feel uneasy, scared, and threatened so you will accept what ws offers.

don't accept! call his bluff. after all, ws doesn't like court rooms...they shed light of day!

That's basically my lawyer said. But I don't want to go to court, either. I'm hoping against hope that he will agree to mediation, so we can just get on with our lives. It's not like I'm asking for alimony or anything too outrageous. Just standard stuff.

I have to wonder.... If your WH gets away with intimidating you now, when will he ever have cause to stop?

I agree with JustPeachy, it seems more likely that he's rattling his saber, hoping you'll back down and give him what he wants.

You are totally right, Ladyjane. My WH DOES intimidate me. I don't know why. I always thought I was a strong person, but maybe not. I think part of it is, that's his personality, and I guess part of it is b/c I have cared for so long what he thinks about me. I need to turn that off.

The more I think about things... what on earth did I see in him? I saw what I wanted to see, who I wanted him to be. He's not that sweet caring H at all.

No one can promise you that your WH isn't stupid enough to take it to jury trial. Frankly, he doesn't sound like a rocket scientist to me....so who knows?

But I don't think you should allow that possibility to "intimidate" you. Afterall, who's going to end up looking like an idiot? ....you or him? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

On your other thread, you wrote this....

Now, imagine a courtroom full of people down in the Georgia Bible Belt listening avidly while you describe in specific detail what "freaky" means. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> lolol

If it were me...I think I'd increase my settlement demands just hoping he'd be fool enough to want to 'go there'. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />