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Well guys, here we go again.
I was holding back telling you all about the guy I was dating for the fear of what has come to be.
He stopped by my house this morning and let me know that he could no longer continue to date me because he was in love with someone else. Yep. Seems he's still in love with his xgf. Sound familiar Devestated??
I don't have to tell you all how I'm feeling right know, as I'm sure you can well imagine.
So much for being ready to release my heart again. I can't believe it, but I forgot how bad it hurts. From the whole punch in the stomach to the tears.
Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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Oh no ((((Karona)))) I'm soooooo sorry. I know how much it hurts, especially when you are starting to put your guard down. I didn't know there was an xgf, just a deceased wife. Man K, this just bites<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> and again, I'm so sorry you are hurting once again. You've got mail coming....(((hugs))) DW
DW--BW....separated/divorced since 2003
Re-married 7/09!
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personal recovery
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{{{{{Karona}}}}}
I'm sorry too. Sorry he doesn't know what he's missing, sorry for asking for an update the other day, but mostly sorry you're hurting...
FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06
What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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Karona, that really stinks! You might remember that I too dated someone for a mnbth, before she "realized" she still loved her BF. Ugh.
What is even worse in your case is that you were encouraged by mutual friends to meet each other, which would presumably serve as a good anti-psycho filter, but apparently not.
Bummer, I'm really sorry.
AGG
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Thanks DW! You've got mail!
Thanks for the thought cyllanlisa.
LT~ Don't be sorry for asking. I appreciate your thinking of me. I was trying to be tight lipped thru the early stages because of failure. Thing is, I was so excited about him and so proud, I couldn't hold back the news. Funny how you think things are going so smoothly and bam! Thanks for the thoughts.
AGG~ I remember you mentioning her. I just really hurts because I was really putting my heart out there. I wanted him to know that I was interested. I wasn't talking future stuff, but did let him know the proud feeling I had. He just was the kind of guy I could see myself with.
And yes, the friends that encouraged our meet are quality friends. They are people that I admire for their own lives, so yeah, it bites.
Thanks for caring.
Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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As much as it hurts, you do know deep in your heart that you are just getting ready for the perfect one - right?
With each step, you are opening your heart a little more, and seeing how wonderful you are through other people's eyes.
Lick your wounds and remember that it OK to mourn, but the future awaits.
It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
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Oh Newly,
That is the single most kindest thing I have heard.
No, I don't realize that today. I saw so much potential with him, so I'm blinded right now.
It was good to "feel" those feelings again, and know that they are in me, still. Down side, hurts like crazy!
Newly, you are a great friend. Thank you, thank you.
K!
Divorced 12/17/2003
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I saw so much potential with him, so I'm blinded right now. Of course, and those are the ones that hurt the most - when you see so much potential, when you feel like all your waiting has finally paid off, and when you feel good about trusting and loving someone. And then they slam you right back down to earth. It hurts, you bet. FWIW, in the long run this will help you appreciate the right one when he finally comes along. Obviously this guy was not worthy of you, so you are better off without him. Better to learn this stuff now than (gasp) become really involved and THEN be blindsided. You will do better, I am sure! AGG
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YUP, that pretty much sums it up. "Potential" I felt that everything I had been told about him was so true, and we indeed were meant to meet.
Slammed is putting it gently! And yes, you are so right, now is much better than later..... I have respect for myself tonight knowing that I was true to myself during this 5 week period.
I don't know that I would agree that this guy was not worthy of me, but, I do know, if he couldn't show me/give me the love that I do deserve, that in itself would be a tragedy.
I don't always have the highest opinion of myself, but I do believe that my core is good and I am worthy of being loved.
I know that I have a lot to give, and someday, hopefully, I will meet "the one".
Thanks AGG, again, I appreciate your kindness.
K!
Divorced 12/17/2003
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I am so sorry to hear about this. Sorry that you are so disappointed. But remember that you are still growing. This relationship was one building block in your future...a growth experience. I do wish growth experiences didn't cause so much pain.....I wonder if butterflies remember the ordeal of metamorphosis.
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No, I don't realize that today. I saw so much potential with him, so I'm blinded right now. OK, for today, but you will see tomorrow that... It was good to "feel" those feelings again, and know that they are in me, still. ... he came to your life with a mission - to awake those feelings, to prove they still exist in you, and that they can grow more and more. So, the mission accomplished! Say a thank you to him and put him in the bookshelf, as other books well read. And, hurry; life with richness of new feelings are waiting!
I'm not Belonging to Nowhere anymore! :-)
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Cinderella~ very sweet analogy. Oh how these growth times hurt. Thx!
B2M~ I must tell you, I have went over in my mind time and time again the WHY he came into my life. I have a strong belief that people do come into our lives with a purpose.
Even though I'm hurting it's good to know I'm capable of feeling.
I like your book thought. I do need to put the whole thing away, and learn, and grow, and move on. Thx.
I'm thankful and amazed for all of you here. Time after time, I have come here, and have been lifted. Thank you all for your time and positive thoughts.
Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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Of course, with a purpose...
I like to say they come, together with some events, as - Signs... where to go, how, what to go through, what (not) to become...
We just, blinded by making pictures in our heads (mostly related to 'future'), usually don't recognize them...
Yes, I believe in Signs... and still learning to read them... on time...
I'm not Belonging to Nowhere anymore! :-)
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You are a strong woman. The next guy is the one.
Lots of hugs to you
BS age 38
Sep 03 DDay
30 June 05 Divorce
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Karona, The right one will come... Sorry you are going through this tough spot. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> Keith
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B2~~Ahh, reading the signs.....on time. So much to learn.
Thanks Zizzy and Keith. I do believe that one day, I will somehow meet one, and I will be what they desire.
And maybe, just maybe, M came into my life finally, so I could have closure on him, the person. He has been mentioned to me for 2.5 years and we just now met.
He was always in my mind that I was meant to meet him. And, now I know. I liked him a lot, but, I wasn't the one for him. Hate it, but it's reality.
Thanks
K.
Divorced 12/17/2003
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ahhhhhhh sweetie!! I'm so sorry. If you need to really VENT you know how to find me. I could use a good venting myself so maybe later today I'll email you.
Keep your beautiful chin up.
HUGS!
Me, 43
DS18, DD12
Divorce final May 10, 2007
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K: I know you will downplay this - however you are an inspiration to many on here and to 2 special girls there at home. You are doing this right K - and it will pay off. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> "The important thing is not that we can live on hope alone, but that life is not worth living without it." FR
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you stop to look fear in the face. Challenges can be stepping stones or stumbling blocks. It’s just a matter of how you look at them. The purpose of life is to live it, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience
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Thanks Alluring. Sounds like things are crappy your way too. Sorry to hear that.
My friend FR, you're always kind to me.
I feel anything but inspirational.
I know my girls think the world of me, and that is what brings me thru the life trials. If not for them, my life would be empty.
K.
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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