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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2 |
I am completely beside myself. My partner of 4 years has been unfaithful recently and is in the state of regrets, depression and confusion as far as who she has "true feelings" for - Me or her co-worker. She says that if things were right with us, the affair never would have happened. I find that to be completely untrue. Nothing can justfy an affair in my book. She has used the God factor on me - saying God put the person in her life for some reason - Trying to believe that God has something to do with the affair. God would never do that knowing how much pain it would cause me. Why at this point am I the one trying to win her back? I don't want to live without her. Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated.
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Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 1,171
Member
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Member
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 1,171 |
Well, in a sense she may be right. If things were right with your relationship, her Emotional Needs would be met and she would be less likely to get involved in an affair. Should she have done that? No.
I don't believe the God factor...you could just ask her if it was really the Devil factor...was the Devil tempting her? Was she strong enough to resist? That is just a justification.
Anyway, did she ever indicate to you that you were not meeting her needs? Is there anything she asked you to change? Anything about you that bothered her or she would complain about?
If she didn't give you any indication that there was a problem, then it is totally her fault. But if she did and you blew her off, you have to consider your part in this.
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2 |
I have considered my part in what happened. Obviously I was not meeting all of her needs, but we had a commitment that she would help me get through some difficult times that I was going through. Couldn't hold up her end of the deal. No, she didn't come to me and tell me what needed to be adjusted. I know that affairs are not the way to find a life partner so I am hoping that she will come to her senses. But, how long do I wait???
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