should i help her move to her new place when the time comes
or should i let her do it on her own?

not to mention if she is still w/ OM he might come and help her when im not there and i dont know about the rest of you i dont want that ******* in my house.

i should suggest to her to have her father and or sister to help her.

I may be on the wrong side of this, but I can't imagine helping her to move is anything I'd do. To me, it's one more way of shielding her from the consequences of her adultery and that's never advisable. Let her begin to understand right from the start how unaccomodating that cold, cruel world is out there. I hope you aren't helping finance her new love nest either. That would really being shielding her.

Have you taken steps to safeguard yourself legally? WW needs to understand she has to continue to meet her financial obligations while she's off on her own.

hey bro...im going to differ alittle...but ill explain...

she KNOWS you love her...
she KNOWS you dont want her to move out..
she KNOWS you will do anything to save your marriage..
she KNOWS that what she is doing is wrong and hurtful...
she KNOWS she is acting like a spoiled brat...

she knows all these things....so STOP SAYING AND DOING THEM!! it will save your feelings and your give you some POWER back that she stole from you...

so...when you put up a wall like telling her all these things...its like telling a spoiled brat NO...they gonna do iy ANYWAY...her feelings right now are SPOLIED BRATS...

if you look at that way...keep things in perspective...you are not dealing with a reasonable, logical person...

heres what i would do...not only would i help her move out, i would help her find a place too...GO with her bad feeelings..not against them...this really is a HARD concept to grasp but understand...SHE IS LEAVING...no matter what you do......

LET HER GO...

if you fight and struggle all its going to do is cause you to tail spin out of control and go deeper into depression...

freedom is a concept she dosnt understand...GIVE it to her...willingly....its HARD to fight against someone whos not fighting back...she NEEDS you to fight with her...thats how she is justyfing her affair and moving out....

THEN come back and do the plan a/b stuff....but BE strong and keep at it...its like dealing with a little kid....YOU HAVE TO BE SMARTER THAN THEM...you need a plan...you need some direction....just let her go...

as for the BF...if hes like my X's BF/now husband...hes most likly a COWARD and will avoid you....just ignore him...

iknow you are having a hard time...ive been there but this is also stuff i have learned and it worked for me...

i didnt save my mariage...got to a point that i didnt want to...but life is SOOOO much better now...

i wish you the best but protect yourself financially, physically and emotionally...STOP letting her beat you up emotions...think about it long and hard....having her leave might even goive you time to regroup and recharge...

this is just my opinion...

hang in there

sturgis:
your right im goignt to let her go and im day to day regaurding helping her move or not. i do knwo this i finally went a complete day w/ out calling her for once.
thank god.

now i hope i can go anther day then the next ect....