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#1634322 04/12/06 08:36 AM
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is it possible for ws to end affair if its highly emotional and she really attatched to him...also im depressed today i got caught snooping through her stuff last night and she is upset...oh well life goes on..

mruggi #1634323 04/12/06 08:37 AM
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Yes, affairs do end. Did you allow her to beat you up about the snooping?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


MelodyLane #1634324 04/12/06 08:41 AM
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You have every right to do snooping. She is cheating on you and putting your health at risk for STD's. You need to stand up to her and establish boundaries. No consequences to her actions equals no motivation to change. Remember nobody respects a doormat. I wish you luck.

MelodyLane #1634325 04/12/06 08:47 AM
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she said you know hats going on here so just ask..i tried to play her voice mail and called om number but he did not answer...

mruggi #1634326 04/12/06 09:08 AM
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she said you know hats going on here so just ask..i tried to play her voice mail and called om number but he did not answer...

Wouldn't that be silly to ask a dishonest person for the truth?

Why not just get shrewder, mruggi, and don't get caught next time? Can you put a voice recorder on your phone? How does she communicate with him?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


mruggi #1634327 04/12/06 09:15 AM
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she said you know hats going on here so just ask..i tried to play her voice mail and called om number but he did not answer...

Funny my WS said the same thing to me...that I should approach her and ask her if I'm suspicious. She also swore on her kids before I found out about the PA that there was no emotional involvement with OM.

Please don't fall for this and listen to Mel for she knows what she speaks of.

Man it's scarry how so much of what the WS says is typical to many.


Married 10 years, Legally Seperated Aug 2,2006
1 year of Plan A followed by 1 year of Plan B...
...now stepping towards recovery?????
BH 37(me), WW 35, DB 7 & DD 5
My Story
My struggle with an EA
MelodyLane #1634328 04/12/06 09:23 AM
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mel, im trying to do a good plan a but once in a while i slip..i asked my wife for sex the other night and she told me she does not want to be unfaithful to om..we are in divorce mediation right now and ill be moving out next month.this is not a healthy enviorment for me to be in..plan b on the horizon but i cant cut off all contact because we have 2 young children we have to comminicate over..

mruggi #1634329 04/12/06 09:26 AM
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mruggi, is there some reason why you are moving and not her? Do you have good legal representation?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


MelodyLane #1634330 04/12/06 09:29 AM
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she will move and take the kids..the children still dont know ..we are waiting till next month..we dont want to tell her before her communion.i dont want her to take her kids out of thier home...

married 18yrs
kids 6 and 8

mruggi #1634331 04/12/06 09:29 AM
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sry tell my daughter before her communion

mruggi #1634332 04/12/06 09:30 AM
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she will move and take the kids..the children still dont know ..we are waiting till next month..we dont want to tell her before her communion.i dont want her to take her kids out of thier home...

married 18yrs
kids 6 and 8

Do you think its a good idea for the kids to be ripped from their home to accomodate her affair? What is best for your children?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


MelodyLane #1634333 04/12/06 10:15 AM
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me leaving and being able to see my children everyday i think is best for them right now...

mruggi #1634334 04/12/06 10:52 AM
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mruggi...

you my friend are a MAN

MAN I tell you...

you need to act like a strong confident MAN!!!!

not go belly up every time wife uses the distraction of YOUR actions to defuse and deny the reality of her ACTIONS...

time to roar....

dear dear wife you say kindly and calmly...

I for one so look forward to the day when you don't engage in actions that necessitate me having to look in to things....

as soon as you decide that living a life with honesty holds great value for yourself...the sooner I will no longer have to check things....

but thank you for sharing your concerns with me..
hopefully you will see that I as a husband and father will do what I have to do....
for the safety of my children and well being...

do you get it...
have you read ...really read bobpures trials and the brave brave stands he took in the face of a stubborn tempest...

have you read how brave he was
how scared he was inside...and did the right thing even when he wanted nothing more than for the nightmare to be over...

mruggi...you my friend are a man...

strong
smart
HONORABLE

you do not accept or tolerate liars and people that damage children in your universe...unlike OP (OM) who glorify and distort actions that are a direct threat to children;s well being....

tell your wife she should not waste her time going to your daughters communion since she has no value or understanding in the religion....

take your stand....

ARK

Last edited by ark^^; 04/12/06 10:52 AM.
mruggi #1634335 04/12/06 10:56 AM
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me leaving and being able to see my children everyday i think is best for them right now...

Really? So it is better for your kids to be raised by a fogged out WS who will probably bring her men into your home and drag the children into her affair? Are you such a terrible father that this would be the best thing for the children?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


MelodyLane #1634336 04/12/06 01:34 PM
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mruggi,

I am guessing here, but, given your daughter's 1st communion, are you Catholic? If so, have you exposed to the priest at your church....could be powerful.

Regards,

BB

Brit\'s Brat #1634337 04/12/06 01:48 PM
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Gosh, mruggi, I'm so rooting for you. I remember looking at your story and thinking how inconsiderate your WW actions seemed. I so want to say, what do you want to happen? Do you feel that you've exhausted all options and is there antyhing else you can do to keep kids and not leave? Meet WW toe to toe for what you want since it seems that she is really agressive in her actions. Will you have joint custody for your kids or will she have full. DO you want joint custody?

And what are you feeling about this sitaution? Do you feel that it is just flying right by and you have no say so? It seems that you feel powereless to make a move.

What do you want? Are you saying what you want?
Are you able to have full custody in light of her participating in an A while you are married and you do not want your kids exposed to this sitaution? Can you have provision made so that you children aren't allowed around him at anytime? This is the man that she has committed adultery with.


LLG=Living, Learning, Growing formerly reallyconcerned
Trying to stop fearing and start living
BS-35
WS-33
kids, yes
1 D-day 8/2003, 2nd D-day 1/2006
Current status:
Working in Plan A.
LLG #1634338 04/12/06 01:54 PM
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still in plan a we will have joint custody..i will move for sake of children not having to leave and yes i do feel powerless..im saying i want to work it out ..she says she is in love with om

mruggi #1634339 04/12/06 02:23 PM
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still in plan a we will have joint custody..i will move for sake of children not having to leave and yes i do feel powerless..im saying i want to work it out ..she says she is in love with om

How is it in your children's best interest for their father to move out of their home so the mother can carry on an affair right in front of them? Why would you abandon your children in their greatest time of need?

They don't have their mother right now, she is enmeshed in an addictive, adulterous affair. YOU ARE ALL THEY HAVE! SO WHY ARE YOU LEAVING THEM???


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101



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