To all BS':

STOP calling the OP by their 1st name. When communicating with the WS consider one of the following:

1. If the OP is the OW and married....call her Mrs. _______ (whatever her last name is).

2. If the OP is the OW and NOT married, call her Mz _______ (last name)

3. If you don't know the OP's last name, call the OP, just that (OTHER PERSON or even refer to the OP in plural - Other people).

4. If the OP is an OM, call him by his last name.

WHY? The last name is a reminder the OP is NOT part of the family. There is less of a romantic link if the WS hears you refer to the OP by their last name or given NON friendly nick name.

In my case, the OW was called Mrs. Jolie (name changed to protect the not so innocent - OW) and then she got dubbed PBR (pyscho babble rabbit).

When I began using her last name, calling her OW, other people or even PBR......it helped me be less emotional and even the WS began referring to her as such....that really helped. LOL!!! Still the A went on but it certainly was les s attractive.

Just my thought for the day!

take care,
L.

Orchid...

Complete agreement here.

The OP here was always Mrs.....

Very good, advice..and seemingly shows a bit of respect for institution of marriage if, indeed, the OP is married.

Eibrab

Hope I'm not off-tracked.

In some instances OP may be innocent, sure teh 1st name is fine as she's as victim as BS is.

But in some instances, she's in the relationship with her eyes open. If she knows she's going with a married man, why the courtesy to even call her 1st name. She's a b*****, a slut, by any name. Yes, I do bear tremendous amount of hate for such OP!

endofworld

It is rare that an OP is a victim. The longer the A, the less likely that is true. It may start out that way but in time both are guilty as sin.

By NOT giving recognition to the OP with a personal name, distances the OP from the BS, friends and family. Keeps 'em at bay so to speak. This in turn, lessens the pain which the A, the WS and OP attempt inflict on the BS and family.

L.

"But in some instances, she's in the relationship with her eyes open. If she knows she's going with a married man, why the courtesy to even call her 1st name. She's a b*****, a slut, by any name."

In my situation, WH's OW definitely knew/knows he married!
so will get no courtesy from me..just haven't decided how to refer to her as yet..working on it!

I refered to OP as "maxipad"

... yep

you heard me right!

Pep <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Where does she wear it? LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

I bet this doesn't happen very often, and certainly not for very long. I am afraid that in most cases, the OP knows and doesn't care that the WS spouse is married.

Why is that? Because they are just as selfish, immoral and self serving as the WS is.

Who

Hmm. POS works for me.