Dr Harley said an interesting thing to me the one an only time I talked to him. It was a call I made when my wife was still wayward and thought she wasn't in love with me. He said, 'The interesting thing about love is that when you are in love with someone, you think you've always loved them, and when you fall out of love with someone, you feel as though you never loved them at all.'

It's a very interesting phenomenon if you think about it (and buy into it). To a certain extent, regardless of how well or poorly things have been in the past, it is the present feeling of love that your spouse feels towards you that matter the most.

I got to see this firsthand, and these words from Harley echoed in my head when my wife was in the thick of it. There were weeks when she was vaccilating between myself and the OM. One week she'd tell me she loved me, and that she always had. The next week she'd tell me she didn't think she ever loved me. This was the rollercoaster ride I had to endure, but knowing the theory behind the behavior helped me stay strong.

My wife is no longer wayward . . . and she says she has 'always loved me'.

Interesting stuff.

That really is amazing; and so very true. We should show this to every newbie who is concerned when his spouse says she is not in love anymore.