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Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 298
Member
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Member
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 298 |
Hi folks - I have been posting on thread named ...doms day... so my full story is there. quick recap though - is at the end of march w told me she wasn't happy, not me her, needs space, blah blah blah - found out she is in EA with someone at work - and called her on it...she is back to work after 1 1/2 at home with our D 3 1/2 years old. Job is high pressure. Contract ends in june - so she will soon be unemployed.
She has been going all nights of the week with her new work friends. told me she wasn't going to feel guilty, she needs her friends right now - etc...
Last sat. morning i told her enough was enough. commit to our family and marriage or go - D lives with me and we stay in the house. she was an iceburg - and never answered me...stayed in her room until Sunday she went out anyway...gone 12 hours.
I have made myself unavailable to her all week - not answering calls - going to bed before she gets home, etc...we still live together but she in the guest room.
today - she sheepishly asked what D and I were doing for mothers day...and did we all want to go out for brunch?
then on the ride into work she asked if we could go out to dinner on friday. I told her i would think about it...
what do i do with this info? is she playing me - or is she trying to reconnect?
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 296
Member
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Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 296 |
Sounds like she's testing the waters. Seeing if you're standing firm to what you stated as a personal boundary when you said, "Enough is enough, commit to M or go."
Start making your own plans with D. Invite wifeypoo to tag along, but go even if she doesn't want to.
~~One day at a time is all we're given. Just deal with today and let God have tomorrow.~~
Me = 32 FWH in 1996. Current BH
Her = 33 FWW
DS 15
DD 11
DS 7
Discovery March 29, 2006
Recovery and proud of it!
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Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,693
Member
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Member
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 2,693 |
Sounds like she is dipping her big toe into the pool to see if it is to cold to jump into.
Do not turn the heat in the pool up if she is not going to meet your boundries. She will jump in and then what? It seems fair to turn it up a little at a time if she agrees to help pay the heating bill and then actually does help pay for it.
BS 38 FWW 35 D Day 10/03 Recovery started 11/06 3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
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