This is my first post, chat whatever you call it but I am reaching out where ever I can. My boyfriend and I are both 35 and we have been together for 17 years. Living together for the last 13. In the last 6 months there has been a dramatic change in his personality. Then April 1st he told me that he wasn't sure if he loved me anymore.
We have no children thank goodness but I can't help wondering where this came from. I know there is some alcohol and pot involved on his end but no other woman as far as I have been able to tell. Isn't this to early for a mid life crisis? How can I reach him and repair what we have had all of these years?
He is with family in another state for another week and now he is not returning my calls. We haven't spoken for two days and that is the longest in all of our years together that we haven't even said hello. I am in therapy once a week to try to remain sane. I am just trying to read every book and explore every option to save my "marriage".
Any comments or advice would be immensely appreciated.
Thanks!

Knowing what I (we) know about affairs and the behavior of the partner, it sounds VERY much like he may have met someone else.

Wonder what he's up to there in the other state. Is anyone in his family honest enough to tell you if he's seeing someone there?

If he's seeing someone, there is a trail. You just need to find it. Cell phone records, email accounts. You have to check everything.

Is he still living with you? 17 years is a long time to date, why was it such a long relationship without marriage?

I have found some evidence of an affair but of course"they are just friends" there were lengthy cell phone records of some one he met here but is engaged and lives in another state. I did call her twice of course there was no response. I honestly thought maybe she was just being a friend but I guess that makes me stupid.
We never married because we took the money we saved for a wedding and bought a house instead. Maybe that was the first bad idea.

You don't need a wedding to be married. Think real hard about the real reason you never married.

Get the book "Not Just Friends" by Shirley Glass and "Surviving An Affair" by Harley. Next find out who her fiance is and expose to him. Expose to your b/f's family.