Well after 10 months my prodigal finally tells me the reason he left: (not the i dont know excuse) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />
He grew apart /past me.
He loves me/but not in love with me.
He regrets what he did and when i found him and vanessa together.
The reason he moved in witth her right after I found them:
He had been wanting to leave and this was the way out. It was offered to him and he took it.
Divorce:
No he dosent want one and will not give me one
Why?
He is going thru this crisis- he wants me to wait on him (i have for 10 mos and prayed for guidance and healing). He says he loves me but its something in him that is holding him back for now. He said i have done nothing - it's all him and he needs to find out why. give him space, be happy when he comes around not depressed, not sad, if he ask me to go with him - keep expectations low- let him lead- he says. He says his life with her is not what i think- he is there for financial reasons. If he had the money he would get an apartment by hisself so he could think and get his life together. He says he went to a shrink- for a session - and was told he has strong feelings for me (love) an that he needs to go home and work on us. Take small steps.
He says:
He has prayed and asked God why did he leave me and why cant he just go back home?
I have been depressed, more depressed, had suicidal thoughts more times than none (havent tried though).
My 13 year old is graduating and has gone on his school trip and all im focused on is this man.
I have prayed and asked for guidance and the answers have been patience- draw nearer to God.
I am lonely and feel no one wants me or has approached me during this time.
Plan A- done there been there- i have not made him hate being with me, never kept him from the kids, ect.
Went to see a lawyer about divorcing- '
He said I could make things worst. He is seeing kids and still paying mortgage, cleans yard, garage, he said he would do it but i should wait and give this time and see how this plays. He could not pay- then he would have to force child support, visitations, ect.

hahahhaha

Wow the FOG!!!!

Yummy, yummy cake. Mmmmmm.

OK Not helpful.

Sorry about that.

Tell him you can't wait on him until he ends his affair, establishes No Contact, commits to repairing your marriage, gets STD tests done and moves home.

I'm assuming you have exposed his affair?

Lady, like BigK says, if you believe all that, I want to sell you a little plot of land I have just off the coast of Florida. It's a little damp but it's definitely just what you need. Hah!

If you've done 10 months of Plan A, as best you could with him gone, you've stayed at it more than 3 times the period Dr. Harley recommends. Your husband has had way too much time to get comfortable fence sitting and eating that cake. It's way past time to go to Plan B, and that may well require a legal separation or initial filing of a divorce petition.

If your lawyer told you you might make things worse by divorcing your wayward husband, get a new lawyer. Get yourself a pitbull who will fight for you and the children. Right now you are getting the bills paid but your WH might get a new idea the day after tomorrow and decline to pay them any longer. Get yourself and your children protected ASAP.