Carol--<P>I'm sorry you're in such pain.<P>As you already know, something is very, VERY wrong with your relationship. Talk to us, tell us what is going on...more information.<P>I'm hearing that you don't like the OW in your bed. Is your H aware you don't like this? You're giving me the impression you tend to go along with things, even if you don't want it to happen. This is dangerous. Is your H using protection with this other girl?<P>If you choose to work on your marriage, you must stand up for what you believe in, your standards for a marriage. If you do not want to explore group sex, you must tell your H. I will not be judgemental on this topic--however, I WILL say what a couple does should be understood and agreed upon by both. If it is not, it serves the selfish purposes of one, at the expense of the other. Not good, not good at all. This touches upon so many aspects of a relationship, the list is endless...honesty, respect, communication...Dr. Harley's Policy of Joint Agreement is indeed a wonderful way of life if it can be attained..."never do anything without the enthusiastic agreement of your partner." <P>If you choose to leave your H, please check into your area's options for half-way houses for women, etc. If time becomes of the essence and you decide you need to leave now, your police department will be able to put you in touch with people who can help. Churches can help. There are help lines listed in the phone book.<P>If drug or alcohol usage is part of your story with H, and my feelings on the subjects again put aside--if this is not with your agreement, stand up for yourself and do not do it. <P>You are in control of your future. <P>What is it that you want, Carol? And what can you do to get it--short-term, long-term.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Laura<P>"I cannot care a little for you. I love you only just enough to love you all the way."~~Rod McKuen<BR>
