Not sure if this is a rant or what, but I'm stressed out over a major decision I have to make in the next few days. DD just finished her Jr year in HS. About a month ago, I let her apply to a summer program. The deadline was approaching and I didn't want to deal with it. I kind of hoped she would not be accepted. Well, she was accepted and I have to make a decision this week. It's a six week program at a major university on the East coast (I live in TX.)

PROS
* DD wants to go to this university and this could get her foot in the door.
* It would look good on applications to other colleges.
* She would earn 8 college credits.
* It would be a good chance to see if she really wants to go to college that far from home.
* It would help prepare me for next fall when she does go to college.

CONS
* $$$$$, It's not cheap, esp when you add in airfare.
* She would be on her own in a large city.
* She will only have about three weeks free this summer and she has to read 4 thick books for AP classes before next fall.
* She would be on her own ....


The real problem is that I'm overprotective and I also don't want to be in my big house all alone this summer. It's bad enough that WH has left me for OW and SS's won't talk to me (blackmail & brainwashing by WH). Now, DD can't wait to leave me too. I know it's nothing personal, but it's still tough.

It's hard!!!! I feel for you, my YD will be gone 5 weeks with her dad this summer. Being alone is looming before me. But I know that this is what is best for her, she is traveling by air alone!!! UGH!! That just scares me, she's only flown one other time when she was 9 with her grandmother. She has two transfers to make.

What is best for your daughter? Can you afford to send her? Is she a responsible type kid that could take care of herself?

Put yourself in her shoes and see what she might be thinking. Say prayer and look for guidance.

Dawn

Congrats on having a super-smart, super-motivated, head-on-straight daughter.

What kind of supervision is provided to the under-age children at this program? That would be the big one for me.

The money is expensive, but nothing compared to tuition and the cost of homesickness if she decides in the middle of her freshman year of college she wants to transfer back to TX.

Plus, she'll still be taking college classes.

I'm from the Mid-Atlantic. I went to SMU. I was soooo homesick. I ended up transfering back to the east. However, I know lots of people how did well going to school far away.

And, you could have her meet up with the MB friends on the east coast!
I'm sure these programs are supervised and she will be with other overachievers.
I did this to my parents when I graduated HS. I told them I'd applied for a foreign trip, and after I was accepted, I had to get my passport and everything else in order in a month - to go spend a month overseas touring Greece. It was amazing. Much like I'd expect your DD's experience to be.

Open the world for her.

And let us know where it is.

I did the early admission thing between my junior and senior years. But, I did it at the college down the street from where I lived. Next door to where I went to high school.

I think it made it very hard to go back to high school. My pool of experiences was so much greater than those of my peers. I didn't fit in at the high school. And I no longer fit in with the college students. It placed me in no-man's-land socially. I was somewhat marginalized socially any way but this was just another nail in the coffin.

The academic advantages of doing it were outweighed by the social disadvantages for me.

FBWidow said:
[color:"blue"] Start making YOUR summer plans now. Line up some activities to keep YOU busy. Make "dates to talk" with your daughter (specific times for her to call home) but let her know she can call you anytime. Use this as an opportunity to practice letting go. And let her know this is difficult for you, but you know the program's experience will benefit her. [/color]

PS - If she's going to Duke, you can stay with me and visit her <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Well, I thought over it and prayed. It really comes down to me not wanting to let go and DD eager to spread her wings, so I'm going to suck it up and let her go. The program is six weeks starting July 3 at Boston University. We may try to go a few days early for a little vacation before I drop her off. She also wants to visit West Point while we are in the area. Can we say "ambitious". It will be tight, but I can manage the cost. She'll have to fly back on her own and won't return until the day after school starts.

Greengables: They have curfews and planned group activities on weekends and evenings around Boston. They are also not allowed to leave campus alone. She's just at that age where she thinks she is invincable.
Cinderella: I've warned DD about how difficult it is to come back home after having that independence. Truth is DD has always done her own thing rather than "fitting in". She has a good group of friends that admire and respect her for being different.
This scares me more than I'd like to admit. I had DD in college and even before I married I had her to keep me company. I won't like her being gone, but it will be good for me as well.

Boston is a great city, she'll enjoy it.
West point is likely a 4 hour drive from Boston. They'll be more than enough for you to visit in Boston when you go.
Great seafood, history and a good walk around town. Enjoy it.
She'll be across the country, but in your heart.

Hey, if she's going to look at West Point, she should check out the Naval Academy as well! Okay, so I have a soft spot for the Navy.

I think the short term cost will be defrayed by the long-term savings and benefits, not the least of which will be to you, FBW.

My mother always said she grew up with my sister and me. I bet that's a little bit like your case. We all still talk daily, but when my sis and I went to college, Ma learned to live without us.

Do you have a summer project? One that will take time and mental energy? You need something to occupy your brain. Last summer, I learned to knit. You can sort of listen to the radio and knit, but you can't really think or worry while knitting or it goes catiwompus. Sewing works well.

Ma does fund raising and philantropy stuff to keep herself occupied.

I suspect she's considering West Point more for the money aspect. I can just picture her telling a drill sargent that some rule is stupid so I think a visit there would be wise.
I have a lot of projects to do around the house that I have been avoiding or never have time to finish. The fall is always ugly at work so it would help if I pulled a little overtime. And if WH would sign off on the D, I might actually be able to go out on some dates. I'm not interested in anything serious but I'm already getting offers. I tend to be a homebody but I'll try to force myself to get out around other people.

Actually, Boston is a pretty safe city, compared to most others. . . and BU is a great school. . . I think though that you have some security issues that you need to deal with in counseling. . . and the Naval Academy or the Coast guard is actually has much more opportunity for woman than the army. . . but then again, I also went to a military academy.

wiftty

So WIFTT, does that mean you went to West Point? I dated a Cadet. It's a beautiful place. And the Coast Guard Academy is in CT (isn't it?), nearby major cities, but not in them.
FB: Enjoy your free time. Time to live your life.

negative on West Point, Coast Guard Academy, Naval Academy or Air Force. . . but I did go to a federal academy. . .

wiftty

Is there a Marine academy? (I thought that was West Point).
Or, was it an FBI or CIA academy. Now I'm curious.

There are 5 :
Air Force
Army
Navy
Coast Guard
Merchant Marines

I think someone who goes to the Navy or Merchant Marine academies can choose to go into the Marines.

yea, MMA, long time ago. . . so very long ago. . . I had dreams about the school 10 years later while in graduate school. . . I had alot of fun, and wasn't much into the officer and a gentleman routine. . .

but with the people that I know that go to these academies, and then get out, have leadership qualities that aren't as prevalent in traditional educations. ..

wiftty