What do you do with gifts from an X?
I have jewelry that I have been given by former boyfriends. I no longer wear any of it.

To me, it seems disrespectful to my BF for me to wear, for example, a ruby heart pendent given to me by a former boyfriend.

I have those things put away. They are sentimental, but I have no plan to wear them. Not even sure if I plan to keep them.

I'm not talking about gifts from my XH. Those I plan to give to my daughter or daughter-in-laws in the future.

But what about the shorter term relationships with no children involved? I have an XBF who is extremely offended that I no longer wear a piece of jewelry he gave me. He thinks I should return it to him, and he will return an expensive gift I gave him. Which would be fine with me (I'd rather have the air compressor...haha, but I'm a strange girl.)

I would think he'd be more offended if I went along with his plan to trade gifts back, as if it meant nothing to me. Am I supposed to care about whether or not he is offended? I think I'd just rather call his bluff and have an air compressor!

Sheeeeesh.

What do the rest of you do with sentimental gifts from an X?

Obviously they do mean something to you or you'd wear them without thought. I'd trade back, I'd prefer the air compressor too. Especially if it's fairly light weight. LOL.

If it's good jewelery, I'd have the stones reset. If it's not, give it to your daughter as well. Or wear it and enjoy.

I usually lose them!
I just found a diamond band from my XH and I'm wearing it because it's a nice ring. (BTW it was given very insincerely - as if his mom told him he should buy something).

So, now it's just a ring I like.

Green -- some of them just seem too "romantic" like hearts or whatever. Or they weren't really my style to begin with, and I wore just because they were a gift from someone I was seeing at the time.

I'm a car freak so if I get something I need for my car, I find that WAY more ROMANTIC. Like they've actually thought about me and what I might like or enjoy...

Newly -- lol, me too. I have lots of single earrings -- too bad I'm not one of those gals with lots of piercings!

Just have them reset. collect them all and have them set in to a pin in a car design!

I keep it. my xh owes me money...lmao.

I think I agree with you Lexxy - it's not something you can just wear and not think the new boyfriend will appreciate.

Give it to charity? Give it to the old boyfriend's daughters?

I had the stone reset into a necklace from my engagement ring. I rarely wear the necklace and no one has ever said they minded.

It was a little unnerving that BF wore a ring constantly that his ex gave to him. After a while I kind of got used to it and even accepted it when he said it meant nothing to him other than an ornament.
Recently we had constant stress for several weeks over the upcoming visit of the ex wife. I got so ragged out that we ended up having tense discussions because I felt that he was so worried about displeasing the ex that he totally discounted how he was making me feel with his actions.
Well I guess the ring that meant nothing to him??? must??? Because he took it off. His reason - he didn't want me to see anything of his ex on him? And he was starting to think it was bad luck?

Honestly - if tokens don't "mean anything" why are they so important? If they don't mean anything, then why did BF want to take off her ring unless he was already aware always that it was there???

Lexxy - from a hindsight perspective I suggest that everyone should box memorabilia up and then be prepared to part from it should it be a threat to a new relationship.

Which it shouldn't be - right? - it doesn't mean anything...

V.

Sell it on eBay!

I took all of my jewelry gifts from my Ex-H and an old, old boyfriend (not much of a jewelry gal, I'd rather have a power washer or a new lawn mower), sold them all on EBay, and donated the $$ to an animal shelter that I adopted my doggies from! I felt soooo good doing that - I closed a chapter in my life (those rings and stuff made me meloncholy when I saw them sitting there) and did something for an animal in need!

Thanks everyone -- these are some great ideas.

My daughter gets everything that her dad gave me. That will be meaningful to her.

Everything else is going away. I like the e-bay idea. I have a couple things I might do that way.
The rest is getting donated.

Good for you Lexxxy <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Gosh, I've been thinking about all the stuff I have (not that it's alot, but....)

I have some really nice jewelry that my exWH gave me...I still wear most of it b/c I just plain ole like it, no emotional attachment to it anymore though. Is that bad? BF doesn't seem to care. All of it will go to my DD too.

As for the other stuff, old BF gave me some stunningly beautiful scarves from India, and a few outfits that I really love and still wear, some fantabulous balsamic vinegar from Italy......again, no emotional attachement or reminiscing...I did get rid of old cards, emails, pictures and such etc...

I dunno, it's all just stuff to me and part of my past and if BF asks about it, I'm honest....again, he's not bothered, as I'm not bothered i.e., by a case of CD's some chicky burned for him way before I came in the pic. I actually like some of the CD's and listen to them <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

If you are into Feng Shui -- or however its spelled -- it says to rid your surroundings of ANYTHING that reminds you of a past love so you can be ready to fall again.


Mrs. W8ing

The only jewelry my XH ever gave me was my wedding ring (come to think of it, I bought it myself...) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

No problem here! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Alph.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


(btw, same here <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> the ring (he bought), that is...)

Somehow I 'cannot understand' this... Why would it be disrespectful? (If you like that PIECE OF JEWELRY of course).
I mean... you have your past, you had love for other men, you had gifts from them... what's the difference?
I mean, I cannot see it...
For me it's just a part of my past, and you cannot get rid of it even if you want most...


I still have some jewelry from my BFs (before marriage), and from time ot time I wear it, most of it not, for they are outdated now <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


What a piece of... art <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/ooo.gif" alt="" />

I couldn't agree...
IMO, you are ready when things from your past don't bother you... and the best proof that they do not is if you face them, and not if you just hide them from yourself...