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This may sound uncaring...she has rough issues to deal with...and my perspective, having been in her place, as well, is that those issues she's had to deal with all her life...now she is...in a healthy way. You won't get in the way, One...you won't. She's capable...as capable as you are. My urging to ditch the manipulative, for their own good reason for withholding is to ditch that intent entirely.

Not necessarily to tell. Can you see the difference?

No sorry I'm confused.

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How often, may I ask, are you replaying her email words in your head?
At least once a day. I even had a dream about the OM last night. He was trying to show me that him being around wasnt a big deal, but then later I didnt see the both of them and franticness (is that a word?) came over me.

There is a distance between us, almost a shyness. In some ways it feels like we are getting to know each other all over again. My new found honesty has helped exaggerate the distance at times. I think its very healthy for me, but does come at a cost because it can be so "heavy" at times.

My wife has told me that she feels like its coming too fast and I would have to agree at times it feels like it could get out of control.