half of me wants to drive over to her home and other half wants to just stay in my bed cuz what can i do now at 3:00am.He called me at 3:00pm and asked me to dinner at 6:30 so I got dressed up nice and he never came home not even now. I've been working plan A, with no love busters. It's been since april 12, still calls sees other woman. No secret. Is it time for plan B. I'm so in love with him, just married 2 years ago. help someone please.

GS,
I hope you get some sleep. I remember those nights of waiting up knowing he was w/ OW then him coming up w/ some lame excuse why he came in so late.

Have long have you been in plan A? Do you have solid evidence of A? Do you have your ducks in a row? I mean did you gather information about your finances, debts and assets, insurance, retirement plans, tax returns. Do you have a means to support your self?

Have you exposed the A?
Until these things are done you should not go to plan B.

I'm not sure about your story. I think I saw you had another thread....I'll go read there.

Yup I remember those days too,alot of lost sleep

thank you for responding, yes I met with OW the first day I found out about her number on my cell bill april 12, she did not know he was married. However she never gave up the calling or other stuff. He is in fantasy land over her. meanwhile my stepchildren 12,7, come over to the condo everyother day and weekend. I play mom and then on weekends he does not have them he usually is with me. This time he asked me to dinner and said to get dressed and he'll be home at 6:30. He never came home it is now sat. at 12:00noon. No call and I cannot get ahold of him. Everyone except their work knows they are in an affair except kids.My kids 30,27,25 know and are done with his disrespect of me. All of our monies are seperate as we have only been married two years. I supported him as I am disabled and only make so much. Now we live in a more expensive place and it takes both of our monies to live. I guess I will look for a room mate as he is so involved with her their is not marriage work. please talk to me.

I would watch your finances carefully. Be sure that you are protected. I had to get roommates to be able to afford to live, and it was the best thing I ever did. I enjoy living with them.

It was very selfish of him to pull something like this - especially inviting you out to eat, and then having you wait around all night.

just checking on you- have you heard from him?

thanks all of you for your incouragement, WH came home next day after I showed up at op home. Said maybe all three of us should talk quietly just so we all know where we stand. OW left the room, wh got mad and said a bunch of things like why would you come here, she should call the police on you. Just general busted stuff. He walked me to my car and then said I'll be home at 3:00 to talk to you and he showed up at 4:30. Just full of himself. He said it's over after that stunt you just pulled. you do your thing aI'll just do mine and we'll pay the rent and make it until Dec. I just looked at him like he had two heads. I than went to bed. No use arguing with an alien. I told him it was unexceptable to be married to me and stay out at another women's house. Hfe said he just didn't want to come home as I'm always full of drama. (If he does not get his way he acts like this).Now I am supposed to give him his space, and quit with the drama and let him do his job and just chill. Ok, but meanwell back at the ranch I pay the bills, taxes are a mess, and he calls her all times of the day, and sees her at work. what to do now .........

Hi GS,
He wants you to coast like this till December? Lovely. Can you move out? Can he move in with her, that would be great? The fantasy would quickly wear off.

You've been married two years, no children between you, I'd call a lawyer and move out. Really. Sounds like he wanted a babysitter. The sooner you start removing yourself from this marriage the sooner the drama can end. Calling you to get dressed up for dinner then not coming home for two days is just cruel. I'd remove myself from this man's reach ASAP.

But, what do you want? Please take care of yourself during all of this - it's hard, no matter how long you've been married - Dru

Update on this day, WH got into fight with OW and she said to him that he needed to take care of the ****** (me) so I did not bother her again. He got mad and it ended all by itself(funny how it was almost 5 months to the day)The fantasy was over as everyone knew about it. Now, I am trying to go by the book of his needs her needs and work the program booklet. I will see the IC on Thur of this week. He says he will go, but I'll wait to see. I'm still moving ahead and making myself be a better stronger person. The withdrawel period is over also as we do alot of out of town stuff on weekends and spend alot of time playing tennis together with friends. 4 days a week. We need good marriage counseling as the brutal honesty will never come out without a mediator. help someone with the next step.

Hey there,
are they still working together?

I hope it did break off, but it may have also just gone deeper underground.

Stay alert.

If they work together, recovery is going to be next to impossible.