How are you? Summer is here. Isn't WH(?) due to retire? You were talking about starting a business? Is he still staying in the city late? How about an update. Even if nothing is changed let us know how you are.

Hi ChaCha...love the new name by the way!!

You have a very good memory. My WH retires at the end of this month. He is currently looking for a job and yes we are starting a hockey camp this summer.

Our life has not changed too much. WH is still in the fog. He is home every night, but not here if you know what I mean. Well, let me take that back. He has been good company lately. I thought that maybe the fog was lifting, maybe the A was over. I found out last night it's not over. There is still some sort of contact. I am not sure what their relationship is really.

I have asked my WH to leave and he refuses. Says he loves me, but we all know actions speak louder than words. He talks about the future, but again empty words.

I am not sure what I am going to do.

I have been reading here and keeping up with your story. My WH would be doing exactly the things yours is doing. My WH can't stand to be away from us! He wants his own life, but wants to keep his family where he can get to them. Can we all say cake eater!!!

I don't post here because I feel stupid. I have done a stellar Plan A for a year, which is waaaaaaaay too long, but can't go into Plan B with WH refusing to leave. I don't want to file for D. I want my children to have a father in their lives. My son is 2 years from graduating, but my baby is only 9.

So life goes on and I assume sometime in the next couple months decisions will be made. WH will get a job somewhere and then my kids and I can plan a life either with him or without.

Thank you for checking on me. Like I said I don't post because I feel like a failure and don't really want that to be public knowledge!!!

You are doing great in your Plan B. Keep up the good work!!

Thanks for the update. I use to feel stupid about posting. WH was not in my face w/ OW or being wildly abusive to me or the kids. He didn't walk out and leave us...I literally had to push him to leave. He was quietly abusive...on the fringes of the family but not really there. Not connecting w/ me but throwing crumbs occassionally that gave me a little hope but without any follow thru. Made vague plans for the future but wouldn't hold my hand or kiss me.

Its living in limbo merely trying to exist always looking for some kind of sign or acknowledgement. We are NOT alone in this. I know how you feel. It doesn't mean you should settle and it doesn't mean you shouldn't get support. You need a plan for you and the kids. Others can learn from you and you can help others. SO POST MORE OFTEN!!!! You are not a failure just on a different time frame. Geeze, its been 2 yrs since I got the I love you but not in love with you speech.

The best advice I can give you right now is be proactive in your life...don't just wait for life to happen.