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Joined: Jul 2004
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Hello Friends, it's been awhile. Maybe a few of you still remember me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />
My divorce was final June 13th. Finally, it almost looked like she was going to delay it again. DDay was May 2004, Filed for DV in July 2004. Then in January 2005 began a series of failed reconciliation attempts. The Ex quit counseling twice during that time. The counseling would start well, but after about the fourth meeting, when things were required of her, she quit.
Funny how I felt going into the Attny office the morning before the final hearing ... I felt completely different, not the wreck I was two years ago. Almost cheery, and eager. Though if I had my druthers I would still have my family together. But I could only do my part, I couldn't do hers. When I really realized that ... I felt a true inner peace.
Anyway, I'm feeling good, behaving for the most part, and looking forward to making new plans for my future. That is the part that was the hardest. Feeling robbed of my future and my plans and goals and dreams. But I have a few new ones now, and things are looking good.
I want to thank everyone on here who put up with me, and gave me some great advice (most of which I took, and some which I took much to late) This board was really a life preserver for me when I needed it most, when I couldn't even tread water, you guys and girls helped me keep my head above the water and showed me the steps I needed to take to help myself and my family.
Blessings on all of you.
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />
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I walk the recovery path too, ... but I walk alone.
HOW 'BOUT THEM STEELERS!
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I've finally realized now, that you just have to keep breathing. Tomorrow the sun will rise, and who knows what the tide will bring. Tom Hanks (Castaway, 2000)
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Joined: Sep 2003
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Good to see you are doing well. We heard from Maddy the other day, and she was divorced. She is doing fine too.
You'll get snapped up by some lucky woman soon, but please take your time.
It takes awhile to heal, no matter what the outcome. It's been over 3 years for me, and I feel GREAT now.
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Joined: Oct 2000
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Hi <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
She sure put you through heII ... but no more
you did your very best ... never doubt that
Pep
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Joined: Mar 2003
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Hi TJ, What a nice surprise to see your update. You sound good.
I am glad it's finally over for you. I hope your kids are doing okay. Do you have joint custody? Is your XW getting along well with the kids or is it still a stuggle?
Married 1976 Me:BS Him:FWS MB Weekend March 2003 2 S's: '77 & '80, 1 D: '82
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Joined: Dec 2004
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Wonderful to hear from you, Tom!
Truly appreciate the update.
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 924
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Hey Believer, I'm planning on taking my time. I'm a pretty deliberate fellow, but I'm not going to take too much time <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> I talked to Maddy a few times about a month ago, she sounded good.
Yes Pep, she did. She still tries. I thought after the final hearing I wouldn't have to listen to the drama and irrationality anymore, but its still coming my way. I just don't have to pay very much attention to it anymore. And I think I did do everything I could, that is what made the ending easier I guess. I didn't leave anything undone, I just couldn't do it for both of us.
Trix <hugs>, Yes we have joint custody. And yes she still is having issues with the kids. One particulary nasty one a few weeks ago. Both have again asked to live with me. But it has been sorta quiet lately. It has been really hard on them, but my Ex doesn't see it. Everything is still about her. She won't really do anything for or with them unless there is something in it for her. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> Just like her own parents. But the kids and I still have a blast and they usually can't wait till we have time together.
Frozen ... I hope things are going well with you.
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I walk the recovery path too, ... but I walk alone.
HOW 'BOUT THEM STEELERS!
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I've finally realized now, that you just have to keep breathing. Tomorrow the sun will rise, and who knows what the tide will bring. Tom Hanks (Castaway, 2000)
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Joined: Sep 2004
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Hey Tom -
Of course I remember you...you were poster #1 to me way back when (seems like about 20 years ago!).
I, too, am now divorced (in case you don't keep up with my saga).
Sounds like you and I have reached a lot of the very same conclusions....but it sure would be nice if we didn't have to live through those battering emotional experiences to get there, wouldn't it?
Nice to hear from you, my friend.
Georgia
Formerly G.G. and Jeb Me: BS 50 She: xW 50 Jeb: Mini Schnauzer Married: 29 yrs Children: MM25, MM23 Plan B - 12/06/04 Divorced - 11/17/05
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Hey Tom!
I wondered about you just the other day!
I am pleased at your healing.
Believer is right....you'll get snapped up...and she will be very blessed!
- Kimmy (used to be niosgirl)
I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten. My Story Recovered!
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Tom:
I gotta run 2 a meeting, but I wanted 2 say YO!
-ol' 2long
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