Welderboy, I know what you mean. I just got an email from my soon to be ex that said...
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Paul,

Sorry it took me so long to write back. I've doing interviews for the past few days. I know that this probably didn't require a response, but I wanted to give one anyone...

You must know that I will always love and care for you too. I'm not bitter about anything, despite everything between us. I think things happen for a reason. I'm glad that you were in my life for so long. Something that no one can ever take away or replace. I hope that we can still be close to one another. You never know what will happen down the road.

Love,
(Wife's name)

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I just don't get it. I do think her feelings are real, but I also think that maybe she is saying these things to lessen her own guilt? Maybe to keep the door open? Anyway, I will be moving on with my life as hard as it is and not keeping in touch with her. She needs to really feel and see the reality of divorce.

She can't have her cake and eat it too...

Paul

If she loved you (like she says), you would be more important than interviews.



Of course she is not bitter...she has a boyfriend (the nerve of her statement!)


OK Paul - I want to gag! She breaks your heart and writes this????


Now this is just cruel. She is giving you hope just in case her new "love interest" falls apart (which it will). Basically she is saying you are 2nd best.


Paul - this letter could have been written by my X. She would tell me this crap all the time. How she loved me but... How I was a wonderful husband but... it just goes on and on.

Let her live her life and don't allow her to hurt you like this. This letter of hers is an attempt to justify in her mind that this is "ok" and for the best.

Keith

Keith

Hi Paul
I know what you are going through I am still married but we do not live as husband and wife. My husband tells me that he doesnt love me but if he met me now he could fall in lov e with me he cares about me respects me and all sorts of wonderful things but then he tells me he doesnt want to spend the rest of his life with me He wont divorce me as he said he thinks he may regret it so in the mean time I have to just it out they always want to keep their options open just incase and dont consider out feeling along the way

I feel your pain. I've been told all that crap too.

Move on. It isn't going to happen. By the time she wants you back you'll be long gone.

It's easy to hang on to the hope. It imprisons you, though. Trust me, I was there not too long ago.

My ex is having fits now because I'm moving on and actually fighting for what is right.

Good luck. None of this is easy, but the solution is simple. Time and effort to move on. It really is that simple. Time will heal the wounds, effort will help you get there and build you up along the way.

Thanks Papaof3, I appreciate your comments.

If you don't mind me asking, why did you split with your wife? Also, she said the same things my wife did but did she ever want to get back with you? Just curious.

I'm moving on the best I can for now. I still miss and love my wife very much, but I know I can't hang onto hope with her. I need to move on like it is a done deal for good...which is more likely then her coming back.

Thanks