Let me start off honestly by saying I am not married to my partner however we have been dating for nearly 9 years and have one beautiful daughter and another on the way! I am 25 years old and was very content with life before baby number 2, however my partner expressed how important it was to him to have another child. So here it is I am working full time very much pregnant now and need some assistance raising our daughter. I have just moved from our mid west home to his hometown in Hawaii so my support is limited to him and a couple of girls that I have just recently met thrugh work. My problem is we moved to his hometown where his best friend and him hang out every day and when I NEED HELP he is never around! I need him to come home after work to play with my daughter and help with her daily routine. I need him around so I can take a break and relax. I was unsure if I was overacting for months now so I said nothing assuming that My hormones were just out of control and it would pass however lately my daughter has been missing him terribly too.I have not said anything to her however, I notice her clinging to him and always hugging him as if she misses him. I notice her eyes when he finally decides to stroll in the house minutes before bedtime just light up with joy to see her daddy. All of this I have expressed to him however he is not taking me seriously. Everyday after work it is like he cant wait to call his best friend and go hang out(I am jealous)! They talk on the phone when they are not together I mean it is to the point I am wondering if he is bi-sexual (as his best friend is)! I have asked for help I have written letters for his assistance and just recently I have screamed for a partner! Am I pregnant and ragging or are my feelings valid?

Alone, your feelings are valid. I know it can be hard to trust yourself when you get this opposite message all the time, but you need to learn to trust yourself.

You can't change one thing about your partner, all you can change is you. Have you read the Basic OCncepts on the site? They can make a world of difference. What do you see as your first step?

It may be some time before your partner comes around, it may not be overnight. How can you get help for yourself? Do you have friends locally? Don't be afraid to get help for fear he will leave you alone more, he may be more willing to help if he's needed less, you just don't know. Try and see you can always try soemthing different later.

Your partner is still on his own path. You need to depend on yourself. Trust yourself and work with yourself.

If he is not going to come home and help with the one child and give you a break, pregnancy - I would ask my church for some help or family. If I recall you moved to his land Hawaii and doesn't he have family there to help? I agree with the poster above...if you don't get help he will just see that you are doing fine. Bringing help in will give him a view of what is needed. This could change him and then it may make no difference. Don't worry about getting help and him leaving you...do you actually want to stay there? Or do you desire to be near your family?

Not clear on the whole family dynamics from what I have read. So do what you think needs to be done and take time for yourself. Keep posting....Blessings...LoveinHim